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I'm so lonely it's insane


#1

I need social contact but yet I’m too scared to go out and meet people.

I feel girls my age are out to get me and I can’t get a girlfriend due to this.

I don’t know what to do


#2

Im nearly 30 and i dont see this paranoia going away


#3

I’m in a similar situation walla. Haven’t been out in so long the prospect is daunting


#4

Are there any social groups you can join?

I’m in a social group for lonely young nerdy people, and we meet a few times a month to play boardgames or watch movies, and people quite often make friends outside the group eventually.
It’s a good way to get out there and meet people, and I can come and go as I please.


#5

Let it go. Relationships suck donkey balls. I was pissed and went to bed early and my iPad had been moved from on my nightstand to the kitchen on his charger. He’s asleep, but wtf was he on my iPad for?


#6

Nope I’m not part of any in fact I don’t even know how to get into one lol.

Maybe I must check on internet…

My friends have all left south Africa so I don’t really have any anymore.

@Freedom-of-speech I just want to know what a relationship feels like. I’m sure there is someone out here for me lol


#7

Yea it’s hard to take the initial step man…

Sux


#8

I understand the feeling of you’re heart pounding and endless thoughtful texts at first…I get that now…you want to experience the “love bug” took me a bit to understand cuz I’ve like always had no problem getting a guy, but I tend to find the wrong ones. But yeah, I can see your point of view…now. Sorry if have been insensitive but I’m on the other end, I’ve always gotten attention from opposite sex…until anorexia,…I miss those days to be able to not be looked at like a slab of meat but as ignored


#9

Yes I want to feel the love bug


#10

As I said sorry, my brain is a box of rocks…I’ve been insensitive


#11

Don’t be sorry you a great person I like u


#12

Ty that means a lot. Cuz I know I can be a bitch, but life’s made me that way, but to those who treat me right, I am like a mother hen. I didn’t have “Love” from family…so I spoil my husband (and ex’s) plus my dogs have the posh lifestyle. Their both strays and now are healthy balls of unconditional love. My ex bff, used to call me “the dog whisperer”. Prolly why I say run from commitments cuz they drain me dry…my mind is working…help…thinking…omg


#13

Maybe if you got out more you could meet a suitable woman. Personally, I think relationships are over rated.


#14

I’m also tired of masturbating but that’s just one of the reasons


#15

One day you will find somone if you work on it


#16

I actually gave up even bothering to try to be in any romantic relationship for a while.
But I had only had two real girlfriends and one other girlfriend after I got sick.
When I got together with my current GF of 15 or so years, I actually was very surprised she wasn’t offended at my advances. We had been friends for a while and I took a big chance when I let her know how I felt. She was also my landlord in a rental situation and I could have been asked to leave had she felt uncomfortable after telling me no.
But I’m just writing this to tell you that just because you haven’t found someone yet, there’s no need to give up. You never know what opportunities will arise and you may feel differently about things as you get older.
It’s very true that their are many relationships that don’t work out. But to make any permanent decision from one idea to the opposite seems excessive.
Kinda like some people who are trying to get clean who have one relapse and then just decide to go on a bender and give up on sobriety. Or someone who is trying to lose weight, deprives themselves until they can’t keep themselves from eating too much, and then decides they just can’t lose weight at all because they don’t think it’s possible.
I completely understand why you are discouraged, sometimes my thinking can go to extreme ideas when I just get into a fight with my GF. Like putting my stuff in storage and hitting the street or even suicidal ideation. Once I calm down, I realize that these ideas are completely skewed and recognize their absurdity. But the ideas still seem to enter my mind often enough.
Don’t be too hard on yourself, try to be patient and maybe find some ways to get out more and possibly meet new people. And there’s no need to place a permanent restriction on the idea of meeting someone else.


#17

Thanks for that reply @eighteyedspy23

Yes I know I need to get out there and make it happen it’s just seems so hard lol.

Glad u back on the forum man I always like your advice


#18

I feel the exact same way as you do. It sucks. I’m like a hermit in a shell. I don’t socialise at all. And I know in the back of my mind how unhealthy they say it is but I just can’t change.


#19

2018, get a toy. :wink:


#20

I’m alone 99% of the time for years, I can see your point as it is a very hard thing to do, being alone, especially in rough times is the worst