I'm just going to have to look at the ugly anger

that is in the mirror. I have been unwilling to. I have alternately been scared of a mirror or flirt with it but, to be more truthful, there is anger in my face that is going to have to be reckoned with if I am to proceed with my life.

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I have anger issues too. Of course, you always tell yourself your anger is justified. You need to think of the effect on yourself of harboring all this anger.

The anger I’m talking about is justified. The problem is that, as a victim, I have to be careful not to transfer my anger on to the wrong people. It does come out as suspicion. I’ve been hurt, I’m suspicious now.

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So is mine. I get beside myself with rage. Like you said, I need to be careful not to transfer it onto people who don’t deserve it.


Anger is as useful as any other emotion. I’m always jealous of people who get angry. It takes a lot to make me angry and I feel taken advantage of by people who know I don’t get angry. But on the other hand I hear you guys complain about having bad tempers. My dad had a terrible temper. I used to listen to him in awe when he told me stories about telling bosses or jerks to go f*uck themselves when they tried to make him look bad or tried to make him look stupid or tried to intimidate him. But a couple of years before he died he told me his biggest regret in life was losing his temper in many situations.

Moving up from denial / pre-contemplation through contemplation / consideration into identification / acceptance? Terrific. Now one can move onto commitment / action.

All excellent. All result-producing.