I think about suicide everyday. My body parts all over the highway. I am sick. People mistreat me. How can I get a job if everyone is assuming things about me?
What does it matter I’m a burden. Put my head through a glass window.
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I’d just live an isolated life in your shoes.
Personally, I’m trying to “get out” of the “matrix” with proper medication before I go out and enjoy life.
Thought broadcasting is just ■■■■■■■■.
I’m so sorry @roxanna…
Can you get on perphenazine? I think at one point I read that you did well on it but maybe forgot to bring it up to ur doctor.
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That’s no way to be. I really wish you’d give Clozapine a try. Nobody here likes to see you suffering.
I know you’re against Clozapine though. But would it help if you at least bought up the subject of Clozapine with your doctor ?
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Vraylar is really good for stopping those kind of thoughts as well.
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I think it’s from my experience with Seroquel that I don’t want to try clozapine.
My insurance won’t allow vraylar
I concur on vraylar. My doctor thinks vraylar is weak or something. She’s not the first to say this, but I’m living in this body and the med is a miracle for me. I bet the insurance hates it because it is so expensive lol.
I agree she should give clozaril a try or at least bring the topic up.
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You could get samples from your doc.
That’s what I did.
The drug reps keep them fully stocked.
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I took latuda when they gave samples to me. I hated that drug.
I had a bad experience with seroquel too. It nearly killed me. I went bananas on it. But Clozapine isn’t seroquel and I’d be trying it if I was going through what you seem to be going through.
its gonna get better roxanna, just try to shake the depression however you can. Im going through a bit of a depression myself and just finding ways every day to get through it. you can do it, dont worry. spring time is a great time to find a new job! the summers right around the corner, you can make new friends, dont worry things are going to get better!
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Just give Clozapine a try or at least bring it up to your doctor. 
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I’m sorry you’re suffering. Suicidal thoughts are hard to live with
Your not a bad person, you just suffer from a hellish disease. I used to hate it when I was really sick and the psychiatrists couldn’t really help me. And now that I’m better I get the best help possible. Bad irony I guess. You suffer, I suffer, we all suffer. But most of us come out the other end and that’s a fact, no matter how impossible it sounds. You just do your best and have faith that down the road, recovery is possible. Just try to comply with taking your medication and what your psychiatrist tells you. Did you manage to get out the other day? My situation is probably a bit better than yours but I look at my situation with my neighbors as a game, a challenge. A battle of wits with unarmed opponents.
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