Scapegoat. Scapegoat. Scapegoat.
You’re really not sounding good. Agreeing with others who have asked you to seek help right away.
It’s 01:04 on a a Sunday
They don’t have emergency services at your hospitals in S.A.??
To me it sounds like harm ocd, evil thoughts and or anger, or is your illness.
Is it psychosis?
Do you feel lost touch with reality?
Is it a delusion or hallucination?
Psychosis can be quite many things.
Yes this is without a doubt psychosis. If you go to a doctor he can help heal your mind.
You need to seek help right away. You are not in any shape to assess yourself. These urges are not what a stable person would have.
I went to the best hospitals and saw the best psychiatrists. For a period of about three years nothing the meds or therapy could do helped me.
I’m okay now . . .