The illness taught me to the contrary that a lot of people are willing to help you because they want to. I have found out that my family will go through a lot of crap for me. I found out that mating is a game of chance and that the best can sire the worst and vice versa. I also discovered that my mind is capable of creating different Worlds and that I can lie to myself. I also see the inhumanity within myself and also that no one is perfect. And I found out who my true friends are.
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You can’t avoid illness in life.
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Maybe I wouldn’t exist if I didn’t have schizophrenia. Maybe I would be dead. A long time ago, I tried going back in time, mentally, to prevent my schizophrenia but the information/memories/warning came back too late. My desire to smoke marijuana 7 years ago outweighed common sense/gut feeling. I had limited social skills/couldn’t connect with people at the time. I failed miserably. So now, I’m trapped reliving my mistakes/reliving a life as a schizophrenic. It is hell without being in hell.
I’ve always had schizophrenia even in my other lives. Or maybe just severe mental illness/disability. I think the gods want it to be so. For lack of a better phrase, maybe in a different/far away/disconnected timeline, I’m not schizophrenic, but I can’t seem to get there. I’m stuck on this branch/subset.
My consciousness/soul cannot get there.
This life hasn’t been too bad, compared to my other lives.
There were different lives I had, where things changed a bit. I think certain people, groups want me disabled. I remember them saying that in a past life. They wanted me to suffer.
I was given Aspergers in a parallel universe by choice/by aliens/by genetic engineering. I’m not sure I have had it in many of lives.
Schizophrenia can be used as a way to incapacitate/punish people, unfortunately.
Hopefully a cure will come someday. There’s no money in it and it seems difficult to cure, but there will be a cure. People’s view on the profit model need to change/will change in the future.
Insanity can be used as a form of punishment, from what I remember.
Schizophrenia taught me don’t give a s**** about stuff u can’t change
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“Trust no one” 151515
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That I shouldn’t make assumptions without clear evidence.
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My second psychiatrist wrote this sentence on a piece of paper and handed it to me. I wasn’t talking to him. I only realized in hindsight many years later that he was calling me paranoid.
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