I thought I was “done” many, many times. I was wrong. You’re going to hit lows in life; you just keep going. If it takes moving–then move. Hell, 5 years ago I had been living independently for 20 years, I had stayed out of the hospital for 25 years, I was going to college, I thought I had my health, I was working part time. Then my world came crashing down. In the space of a week, I lost almost everything. My mom died, I lost my housing, I hurt my back badly. I ended up feeling suicidal and had to be hospitalized.
I had to quit school and take two months off of work. I went from living in normal society to living in a board & care home again. All within the space of a week. I could have given up but with some help I eventually got my life back together. Now I’m working, taking a class, living semi independently and my back improved. Life is always going to throw bad sh*t at you, you can count on that. But it’s survivable. Maybe you need to make some big changes and adjustments. I went from renting rooms and living in a studio to being back in mental health housing. I lived with normal families and neighbors for twenty years but now I’m back to living in mental health housing. That’s the kind of big change I’m talking about. It isn’t so bad now, I’m used to it.
Life always reflects how you’re feeling. If you’re unhappy and depressed life looks hopeless. If you’re happy, life doesn’t look that bad. But both those perspectives are temporary. Happiness and optimism comes and goes and so does depression and hopelessness. You just don’t want to make bad decisions when you’re feeling low, eventually the pendulum will swing and things will look better.