I used to see my family a lot more back during the summer when my sister didn’t have to teach school. Now that she is with her wealthy boyfriend he demands all her free time and me and my mom don’t see her anymore now. I miss my family my niece and nephews but they are busy with work and college. I still see my cousin Joseph and my mom about once a month but most of the time I think I see why I have trouble with situational depression…at least I’m not poor anymore now that I’ve stopped smoking but I wish I saw my family and friends more often…anybody feel that way?
Truthfully I’m very distant from my immediate family. My father abused me and stole thousands of dollars worth of my gear. My mother just doesn’t understand who I am or what I go through and when I try to tell her she just cries and avoids me. My step parents are just that…step parents. My sister is a self righteous soul and just does her own thing without me…and her husband. My family is a mess, and I’d rather not get involved with trying to be a figurehead in my family at all. Truthfully my uncle mike and uncle snake can do all of that without me till they die.
None of my family came to see me after the war, and only my mother and stepfather and sister visited me and beginning graduations. My father couldn’t accept the fact that I had enlisted, and never saw me in uniform or at a graduation at all. He couldn’t handle what was going on. I was branded as some (crazy psycho) by aunts and uncles who were never there for me and never even truly knew me.
Hypocrites. Like me.
I feel the same way, jukebox. my family has always been very buzy with their own lives and troubles, but I was suprized to learn my parents have gone to my 2 other brothers houses at least once a month if not more (they live 2 hours away.
I think my mom has come over my house (10 minutes away) about 2 times in the last 8 years.
I lost my “other” family that I often saw almost daily when my divorse was final in 2013. We are still friendly, but I have been replaced. It feels almost as if I had never been born, almost invisible.
Csummers, I am surprised that your mom rarely visited you despite that she lives close to you. I guess there might be some psychological gap between you two. I am not close to my mom either, because I could not bear her over- self-centeredness. She thinks all her children are just her another self and should live surround her interest. This made the conversation between my mom and her children very difficult or awkward. So I avoid seeing her and just call her once a month and see if she is well.
Juke! What happens sometimes is we are so overwhelmed in our own things that we almost forget others. Especially those who are not in contact for long time. Maybe, text your sister and say hi…Ask what’s going on. I am sure if this is the case, she would be very pleased to hear from you.
This happens specially with siblings and friends but rarely with parents. We must not forget that they are humans too. They have their own weaknesses. We can forgive them for being forgetful and let them know that we miss them.
Same advice for you too @Csummers, ask her why does she not see you that often when you live so close. She is your mother and there is no point in not showing your affection to her. If your loved ones don’t approach you, you should try to approach them.
If still you find that they do less care about you, I am sure that one day they will come back to you. Don’t let yourself feel down for that. You are struggling with your disease…Keep reminding yourself that you are strong enough to take over this hard time. Take your medicines, share what you are going through and discuss your concerns with your doctor. This is your primary thing, anything else is secondary.
Are you studying?
Things get settled with time. I am sorry to hear that your mother gets upset when you try to tell her what you have been going through. Lots of smiles for you and don’t worry about the people who label others.
@jukebox With the holidays coming round very soon… hopefully you’ll be able to see your family more often very soon.
I’m sort of feeling like the forgetter in this situation. I do have a GF now and there have been times I’ve sort of stood my kid sis up to be with my Gf. Not cool I know.
This thread reminded me to take some time to reach out. Sometimes when I feel forgotten and I’m telling my sis how forgotten I feel… she says… “Remind them. Give them a call.”
I have personal studies yet no collegiate activities currently. I’ve tried school, I couldn’t finish due to some nice voices coming all day even in class. I couldn’t take it and gave up for the time being.
I feel different here. I think it’s a very promising thing from you to miss people and want to spend more time with family and friends. Most diagnosed people are socially withdrawn and can’t find the right attitude to hanhang with people. I say make new friends and go out more. If your family is busy from you get busy yourself. But keep it up you’re an exception. Keep well.