I think I have a personality disorder

And I think it’s schizoid personality disorder. And I think most if not all of the people I see posting on this forum don’t have this problem, despite how there are similarities between schizoid personality disorder and schizophrenia.

I guess I just think there’s something about the point of casual social interaction that I’m missing, and it can’t just be due to schizophrenia because of all the schizophrenics I see on this forum doing what I see normal people do, just sharing things for the sake of sharing things, and I guess for the sake of connecting. I can’t get myself to do that, I have to consider it to be useful for me to share something before I want to (I guess there are rare exceptions to this, but not many, and typically just based on curiousity about the response I’d get).

I’ve wondered sometimes if I’m some kind of psychopath or sociopath, but I know I’ve felt guilt before so I can’t say that’s the answer. Also, last year I did some psychotherapy and the therapist told me that she doesn’t think I have an autism spectrum disorder, so that’s ruled out. All I can think of to explain my lack of understanding about connecting with people is that I have a personality disorder. And I just get the feeling that it would be better if I learned to change, but I don’t know how.

Can anyone relate to what I’m describing here? What can I do to start wanting to connect with people?

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I just want to add that I don’t doubt that I have schizophrenia, I just think there’s something else going on with me as well.

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what seems a contradistion is you seem to want to connect with people, they say those with schizoid dont want to but you seem towant to

why don’t you want to connect to people?

that might help resolve this

I don’t quite have a real desire to connect with people. The main reason I’m posting about this is because I think something’s wrong with me for not wanting to connect with people, and I would like to change.

I think it’s because I just can’t imagine anything about it actually being enriching to my life.

it sounds like you are depressed

I am depressed thats why i can relate to :

but this too shall pass

Maybe you’re right, thanks. On risperidone I could only go up to a low dose of effexor before getting a bit delusional, but now that I’m on latuda I may be able to go higher and feel better. Maybe my tendency to think everything’s wrong with me will get better too.

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