For two years I have tried to get the kid sis to agree to a co-therapy with me. We have a huge history to sort out. She holds huge pieces of my puzzle. For two years she has said no, she’s not up for it. Last month or so I hounded again and she said OK.
So finally we had our fist session yesterday. We didn’t even get into much and she only relayed one small story that I already well knew about… and already I’m wishing I didn’t do this.
(she talked about the time when she was 7 and I was so ill that she was sent away to live with our aunt. Our cousin talked her/ helped her into putting an ad in the paper looking for new parents.)
I don’t know… would this be healthy to keep going or should I stop now? She says if I want to stop she would support it. But I keep thinking the more I know the better off I might be.
She says rehashing the past fixes nothing and if we would like to talk about how to move forward she would be up for that. (the dynamic we’re facing now.) She wants more of a CBT sort of thing.
I said I wanted this, now that I’ve got it… I’m not sure I can do this. I think about ALL the help I have getting through my day. There is a lot of it. My sis gets nothing. I have no idea how she isn’t jealous or resentful.
Maybe she’s just accepted what I’m starting to see… our parents wanted another boy and they don’t like her after all. Or because she’s NOT SZ, she doesn’t need any help or care. I think I’m the only one on this kid’s side.
I don’t know yet. Maybe I’ll stick it out… maybe I’ll chicken out.