I recorded myself on my smartphone and it's

pathetic. I sound very, very slow, halting, and hesitating on the piano. I basically sound like ■■■■. I’ve been practicing practically every day for the last fourteen years come February and I still sound like a beginner. Actually, worse than a beginner. My two piano teachers have been defrauding me out of money for years not telling me the truth about my disability. I’ve always known that I didn’t play well but thought I would improve over time. I’m not improving. I feel like such a fool.

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You’re not a fool. There is plenty of good beginners easy piano music out there for you to enjoy. Not everyone is going to be a concert pianist. Maybe you have lousy teachers. I don’t know. But enjoy what you can do for yourself.

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@ZmaGal, Actually I played extremely well the first year after starting piano lessons for the first time. Then, I started on Risperdal Consta shots and it was all downhill from there. I have been on the shots ever since and I have never recovered my playing ability.

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I believe it. My med affects my abilities too

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The point of playing piano isn’t to become good. It’s to enjoy your time. You enjoy your time playing. It brings you joy. It doesn’t matter if you’re the worst piano player in the world or the best.

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For trying to better yourself? For trying to tackle one of the most complex instruments ever produced? For recording yourself to hear how you play?

No none of that is foolish.

What would be foolish would be to give up. You may not be a pro, but it doesn’t matter. If you’re being challenged, then you’re working out your mind.

I’d also wager that you knowing you were recording yourself put pressure on you and you hesitated.

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@Ooorgle is right. Whenever I record myself playing guitar I play ten times worse.

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You probably sound OK.

People notoriously hate the sound of their own voice on a recording, and the sound of their own performance too, I imagine. It’s just you being overly critical, I bet.

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Is this true, really?
I’ve had different people tell me, after hearing me play: “I wish you played better”, and “You play too slow”, and “You don’t give up do you?” That’s really where my self evaluation comes from.

Even if this is true, it doesn’t matter. You play for your own benefit, not the benefit of others. It doesn’t matter if you’re good or bad at playing. Dedicating yourself to your lessons makes you happy and continuing to practice helps you see you can stick to something even when it’s hard.

Also, studies show that continuing to practice a skill requiring hand-eye coordination can prevent or even reverse the effects of Alzheimer’s. Since people with schizophrenia are at an increased risk for Alzheimer’s, it’s really important to stick with it.

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@SkinnyMe. What ninja says here makes sense.

I feel I should be more advanced in Arabic by now but ya know we all struggle. Could be that you sound better to us than you do to yourself.

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I have to confess, I feel guilty about this. I remember when I first became a mod, you posted a video and I deleted it because I didn’t know it was your own playing. I thought it was just a link to a church hymn. I sure hope you don’t think I just deleted your video on purpose. I believe another mod restored it for me back then, but I can’t remember.

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I think I’ve heard you play before. I think it sounded fine

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Fast forward to 2:15

“You showed a ton of heart :purple_heart:

if its something you enjoy then keep doing, it doesnt matter how good you are as long as you enjoy doing it,

I’ve been looking at my keyboard and would like to play but atm i am pretty busy, i had a little session last week but i should do more, i want to look online for songs (hoping to improve my music reading skills too)

I feel i should have improved more by now too

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I do lots of things I’m not necessarily good at.

I paint all the time and the paintings look like a child did it.

Piano is something you really enjoy and have put a lot of effort into,

I think you should continue and hopefully you’ll improve.

I’m sure you’re being overly critical of yourself, which we all are.

Keep doing what you like and ignore people that say things like that.

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Haha that made me laugh !!! :rofl:

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This is the greatest skateboarder of all time. Look how many times he fails on camera. Give yourself permission to enjoy doing things even when you’re not perfect at them.

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i recorded my voice on audacity recently, i wrote a song, it was ok but it needs work, keep at it and enjoy your piano time :slight_smile:

Playing piano from sheet music is very good for your mind. If you enjoy it then you are a natural musician. The only person you should compare yourself to is you yesterday. That said it is possible to over play the same pieces and all the fun goes out of it.