So I’ve been reclassified as bipolar, I am also asking for help from people with depression because this is a depression side problem, not a manic side.
Last night I got really sick and had a whole lot of bad thoughts. My Mom and I call them “bad thoughts” for whatever reason instead of the desire to commit suicide. I think the actual term makes her about as uncomfortable talking about it with me as it would make me talking about it with her.
In any case though I just went into a severe depressive free fall in what felt like two hours. I don’t know if my depression has been building or not but it felt like a free fall. Does a free fall happen with bipolar people? I can’t tell what it was because I’ve been depressed since first grade and was untreated until my senior year of high school with only a two year break from 10th to 11th grade. So depression feels normal to me and I can’t usually tell I’m getting sick until I get severely suicidal. Could I actually be free falling? What I mean by free falling is having a severe depressive attack with little to no warning.
Does free falling exist? If it does is just one episode worth moving up my appointment? I’ve been doing really well and I think the reason I got this way is because I didn’t take the vitamins my dr prescribed. They got in my bag and out of sight, out of mind…
Oh, and here’s an early happy 4th of July picture.
