I mustn't sleep

I can’t sleep bad things will happen if I do. The monsters that my mind accidentally created are ripping and scratching at the barrier of our reality. My energy helps keep them at bay and if I sleep my energy will shut down and they will be able to tear into this world and cause bad things to happen. It’s already happened once. My cousin got into an accident because I fell asleep. He’s in intensive care right now but his prognosis is looking good so it looks like he’ll be fine. But this was caused by a small monster that managed to slip through one of the tears. I can’t let the bigger monsters escape so I mustn’t sleep.

Sometimes I can see them tear at reality. I can see them trying to rip the air but I can’t see the monsters only the air moving. They do the same thing when the world bulges and moves when it’s not supposed too. that’s the monsters too.

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Are you taking your meds? I would see the doctor if i were you. Not sleeping just makes things worse if you have not slept in 24 hours. Maybe you should go to the emergency room.

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you sound sick, you need sleep.

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I know it is scary when something bad and random happens to someone you love. It makes you want to find a reason, because then you have something to blame. If you think it’s your fault your cousin got into an accident, then you have some control over the situation. You can stay awake and fix the situation.

But the truth is, sometimes awful things happen for no reason at all. Sometimes it is all out of your control, and you can’t do anything to make it better. Sometimes, bad things will happen to people you love, whether you sleep or not. If you want to do something that’s actually in your power, try taking proper care of yourself, so your family doesn’t have to be worried about you as well.

Ask your mom what else you can do to help your cousin. Maybe help make dinner for their family, so their mom can just focus on being there for your cousin. Maybe offer to do some chores for them. When a loved one is in the hospital, people are quick to offer prayers and support, but most people forget to help with the more mundane things like laundry. Doing these things might help you feel more in control of the situation, and help address the underlying fear that causes your delusion.

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I don’t know about you but my symptoms always get worse when I don’t sleep. You should sleep it is good for the mind.

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Lack of sleep is a big trigger for me. I’m not above taking sleeping pills to keep a regular schedule. Gotta get some sleep, it’s up important.

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You need to talk to your care soon. If you cannot fall to sleep, you will be ‘fit to tackle’ at the nursing home within 7 days and need lots of meds to sleep. GO TO ER IF YOU CANNOT GET IN WITH MENTAL CARE AND ASK FOR A FEW DAYS OF SLEEP MEDS. Females get really fat for not treating an insomnia attack… If psych DR will call in RX for A little bit of trazadone OR seroquel, you will be better off.

Rest is showing confusion…Yes, you can feel like you are about to fall over even if you just woke up. It’s just part of the fun of schizo…

I’m so sorry about the accident.

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I know this seems very real to you. I appreciate that. My delusion seems very real too. I agree with everyone else that you will feel better if you sleep. Insomnia or deliberately staying awake is never good for MI. I know it will probably fall on deaf ears but ,FWIW, there are no monsters. Your staying awake won’t prevent them from coming into our reality.

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About 3 days no sleep and you will sleep whether or not you want to.
The body takes over and does what it needs.

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Although I don’t know that your monsters exist, I know you believe it, so I’ll give advice as if they do:
surely your energy will deplete the more tired you get. Then you won’t be able to keep them at bay no matter how much you try. If you get some sleep, and look after yourself well, your energy will be a lot stronger. Then you can keep the monsters out of reality much better, as well as fight the delusions.
Of course, taking your meds will also help a lot.

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@Cecilia Yep I take my meds every night like I’m supposed to and at the same time every night. I seriously doubt my parents will take me to the emergency room. Anyways last time I went their they only yelled at me and got mad at me I don’t want to go through that again.

@manallive77 I’m trying to sleep it’s just really really really hard to convince myself it’s safe to.

@ninjastar Okay so in order to help my cousin I have to sleep so that my family can focus on him instead of on me too. I might be able to do that. I can at least try, and yeah I’ll help around the house but in order to do that I have to sleep otherwise I’ll be too tired to help. So another reason why I should sleep.

And if I sleep the monsters won’t come through?

@SP2342 I’ll try to sleep

@5713 I have sleeping pills I just haven’t been asking my parents for them so I haven’t been taking them.

@Stillperkin I do have sleeping pills I just haven’t been taking them because I don’t wanna sleep. I don’t have to take them either they are for ‘when I need.’ Although I guess this qualifies for needing them.

@47average No Monsters? You know this because you have had experience with sz. You know that monsters don’t make sense and in psychosis when it doesn’t make sense to other people and it only makes sense to you then it doesn’t exist. So because to other people and you monsters doesn’t make sense it means they aren’t real. Right?

@Csummers I’ve been getting a couple hours of light sleep but I always get mad at myself when that happens and it scares me when I fall asleep.

@Anon3 Okay so in fighting the monsters that don’t actually exist (easier saying that they don’t exist then actually believing it but if I say it enough times maybe I can believe it a few times) it is best to sleep because my energy will go up, and when I am awake they will have to fight my energy so much that at night when I sleep they will have to rest too for they are very tired from fighting my energy. That makes sense.

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Phew that took a while to write XD

You are doing a good job of rationally deconstructing your delusion. I know that doesn’t make it feel any less real, but it does keep you tethered to objective reality. But no, the monsters don’t exist. They are just your brain trying to make sense out of a senseless accident. People have been getting in accidents since long before you were born. You did not cause anything. The only way you could have caused the accident is if you were driving the car and crashed it. Since that’s not what happened, it’s not your fault.

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Even normal people will crash into phycosic without sleep it’s inevitable, please get some sleep

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@ninjastar I just needed a little push in the right direction with thinking more rationally. I think that’s usually the case. Okay no monsters. hey I just had a thought. We schizophrenics and other peoples with psychosis are smart. We are able to make sense (at least in our own minds) and make connections in a world that almost always make no sense what so ever. So if you are ever feeling down about yourself just know that you are actually smart.

Okay and it’s not my fault because there was nothing I could do to stop it, so it’s not my fault.

@5713 Okay I promise that I will try as hard as I can to sleep.

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I’m sorry to be negative but generalizing schizophrenics are not smart. Especially when we are distracted by scary thoughts we tend to actually have lower intelligence than the general population. And many suffer from cognitive impairment. All in all many of us are less intelligent than normal healthy people. You might be an exception though, you might not suffer from a loss of intelligence. You can get an IQ test or a cognitive assessment.

I apolgize @edvugis for making that mistake. I will try not to generalize agian and thank you for not being rude about it nor yellig at me.

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Protective delusion. You are experiencing extreme anxiety from bad things that have been happening in your life. Believing that monsters are causing this and that you have the power to stop these monsters gives you a sense of control over the situation. (Protects you from feelings of helplessness over keeping your loved ones safe…)

I hope things get better for you soon…not sleeping will make the psychosis worse, trust me. Do your best to get some rest…

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I’ve heard that sense of control part a lot. I’ve also had it pointed out in other delusions of mine so I believe it to be true. That my brain is trying to give me a feeling of control in a situation that I can’t control.

I’m trying to sleep it’s just so hard.

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I know, I’ve been there before…very recently actually…maybe try an over the counter sleep aid like Zquil during situations like those.

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