Schizophrenia.com

I maybe be paranoid, but I see things

I have not read news for weeks, but I saw the frontpage of one evening newspaper when I went to the store today. The Prime Minister of Finland had resigned. He visited the library of my little town in 2007 where I listened him. He did not bother to respond to my question why Finns were in Afghanistan. Showed something about his personality, he just did not value me. But now he resigned. But there is one Ben Z who is the member of the parliament and has been there for decades. He is a Jew who never takes any leadership positions, but always tries to influence in the background secretly, hiddenly. People do not realize this. He once emailed me in 2004, but I never opened his email. I did not bother. In 2003 he was in a TV interview with one Toni who was a leader of True Finns. Soon after the TV interview with this Ben Z, Toni’s problems started. He was the member of the parliament and he started doing stupid things such as driving under influence, using some subutex and other drugs maybe. The he got into the real trouble and was taken to the hospital where he was kept in coma for few weeks. He returned to the parliament but his views were changed, I suppose they made him to do so. His personal problems continued. Eventually he left the parliament and then some years ago he shot himself. But this Ben Z continues to operate behind the scenes secretly influencing others, he probably continues this when the new Prime Minister is chosen. Maybe he is influencing this process too. I am just tired of him.

Why do you say you maybe paranoid? I’d say your just highly observant of the things no one else choses to see.

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I do have a lot of paranoid tendencies, but I see things others do not. People’s memories are so short.

I have not done this for some years, but there was a time in my past when I recorded all key information in my paper notebooks. I had an objective to get at least eight ‘intelligence points’ a day (8 points * 365 days * 10 years = 29200 intelligence points in 10 years). I still have these in my notebooks that I have kept. Maybe this why I recall so well those past events.

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A little paranoia can keep us alive.
I too used notebooks to record “special” things I thought looked out of place.
No one was interested in anything I ever said and slapped a SZ label on me.
I had the last laugh (maybe not) when all those little pieces of the puzzle I kept trying to say was happening added up to the very picture on the puzzle box.
Lesson learned for me, never doubt your intuition, nor discuss it either.
Good thing I shredded all those books to get them off my tail.

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