There was a crisis team worker, a young woman, who read my situation in an eye blink and got me out of there in jig time. I don’t recall her name, but I’m still grateful. She arranged the ride home and everything so swiftly.
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They didn’t arrange for me, but after my mandatory hold, they asked if I wanted to stay for a couple of extra days, so I did since my insurance covered it and I wanted to get my meds adjusted more once I was feeling better-ish.
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Yeah, they can be quite goodhearted sometimes, esp if you behave. If you’re just honest with the cops, they’re a lot easier on you. I’ve never been a good liar, so I gave up on that a long time ago. I always got caught! Amen for insurance, if you have it, too.
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I was too out of it to be bad to them. I was just crying and sad and kept dozing in and out of consciousness. It was a weird time.
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Yes. I was drinking a 12pk or more every day, so I was weepy and maudlin most of the time. Suicide crossed my mind quite often, so I’d just hit 911 and the deputy would come. Thankfully I’ve been able to stay sober since this last Sep.
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Thank you @Happy_H
I’m just scared it might happen again.
I’ve always been terrified of the hospital. Tbh it’s always scared me more than anything else.
Thank you for the support (hugs) 
I have been to the hospital twice. Once, I left during the check-in procedure. I was so scared. My husband stayed with me the whole time, and I convinced him to let me do out patient instead. The second time, I was checked in because I was making plans, but I am very scared of people. Each day when they would do a quick check up on how every one was feeling, they asked if you were feeling homicidal or like hurting anyone and how much, on a scale of 1-10. People would answer yes and give high numbers. I was so scared of being hurt that I couldn’t sleep and couldn’t bear to go near people. I begged my husband to let me do a self-checkout, and he agreed, so I did. I had to put in a notice, then wait for 72 hours. The idea that I was getting out soon was all that kept me sane. I cannot begin to imagine how hopeless and scared I would have been if I had no choice but to stay.
My heart really goes out to you, @Noise. Losing authority of yourself when you are not experiencing a psychotic break and aren’t feeling suicidal is so wrong. I’m sorry that you had to experience that kind of helplessness, and I am very glad that you are out. It sounds like you never should have been there in the first place; you didn’t deserve that.
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Hugs noise. Sorry it was so tough. I’m glad it wasn’t all bad though.
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i completely understand, i often have night mares about how bad he hospitals are around where i live now. the closest one and that my doctor is affiliated with is a troublesome hospital. i’ve been there once and i was sexually harassed by a fellow patient who kept asking me to perform sexual acts on him. every time i reported him i got lectured that he was sick and he can’t help it bull ■■■■ like that.
i slept with the light on which bugged the crap out of my room mate. who whined that she couldn’t sleep with the lights on but she was snoring away by time i went to sleep.
i just remember that i couldn’t relax at all with that guy around, and i brought up painful memories from the my childhood and it was years ago that i was hospitalized and i still have flashes of memories from that guy and the painful memories of my childhood.
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Why beat yourself up? Is it your fault for being sick? I was hospitalized before too but that is also sometimes a necessary part of recovery. I think it is important to rest when you just got out of the hospital and don’t move on till you are ready.
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I had awful nightmares about Satan, the black mass, and so on for a couple of nights, even on medication. I stopped them by turning around and facing the adversary. Just was brave and said he was a big bluffer. Better to stand up to your nightmares than run from them in fear. “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” Hang in there, Noise.
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