I had an abortion

It was 15 years ago. But it still affects me. I feel that even if i didnt deliver and had an abortion my son is messing up my head. I feel he is alive somewhere. I remember meeting a woman at the mental clinic and she told me about her abortion. And she had feelings for her baby as if it was born.

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First of all,

I’d like to say how great you look in your new avatar photo.

Its great to see you smile and that lipstick is fabs.

About the question,

I don’t believe the collection of cells that can be legally aborted equals a baby,

But I completely understand how difficult it can be to cope with that decision.

Maybe you could journal about these feelings in an effort to gain some control over them and be able to understand yourself why you still are so effected.

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I believe abortion is wrong. But I also think it’s a woman’s choice. I can understand how it still affects you. I hope you are doing okay.

i was mentally unwell, afraid, and not taking care of myself, and i miscarried. i was crying about it and heard a voice telling me i did not want it anyway. and that was true.

i did not think i could be a good mom.

like you it is still a part of my life. and i feel bad because i did not want the child to live.

many other complications exist around the loss. i dropped it in the toliet and flushed the toliet. i suffered guilt because of that. the hospital told me i had a complete miscarriage and a dnc wasn’t required. i believe i did later call it back.

anyway i feel for you. things happen and we don’t always feel great things. (((Kerli)))

My only chance to have a child was aborted by my girlfriend. I paid for the operation because I wanted to support her in her decision but I still feel bad about it…I am sorry you are down about it…

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I’m very sorry that you feel regret, but please know that what you did is not a bad thing whatsoever. The bad thing would have been to have a baby you weren’t ready for. Have you talked about it with a therapist? Some woman have troubles dealing with abortion, even years after. It just means you are very caring.

As for me, I did it before, I would do it 100 times again. its not even a choice for me, there is only one option. But as a good feminist I am pro choice and fine with a woman’s right to have a baby. I just don’t understand or really sympathize.

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I’m sorry you are feeling this way Kerli. You have done nothing wrong.

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I was almost aborted three months in the womb. My mom said she loved me so she keep me. My dad fist fought out in the hallway of the abortion place.I’m not going to judge you. I have thought about what if I was in this person’s shoes and I had an abortion. A kind of sadness went through me. I think its a motherly instinct inside sometimes. I’m scared I might upset you kerli so I’m gonna stop here.

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I’m sorry you’re having trouble. This organization has a hotline for women who have had abortions and are struggling with the emotional toll. I see their poster in Planned Parenthood all the time. Maybe they can help you.

https://exhaleprovoice.org/after-abortion-counseling-pro-voice-approach

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To cheer everyone up. :slight_smile:

I’m so sorry xxx hope you’re ok. Would you like to pm me? I can sympathise…

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Whew! Lots of tough choices. I think you did right in supporting your girlfriend’s decision.

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I believe men have no right to choose for women whether they can abort or not…lots of saved lives of the young women who aren’t ready for a baby. I believe it is totally up to women themselves.

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To me, that is the crux of the abortion question - when the collection of cells becomes a human life. I’m not going to pretend I know.

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