I really did.
That is, until the Doctors medicated me and stole my soul. They turned me into a BumbleFukk.
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I was a doofus before meds. Plenty smart enough but couldn’t follow through with anything to any level. I was smart enough to know a lot of stuff but the important things. I was smart enough to get me in trouble and foil every relationship I ever had…
Truly. On meds I miss that energy but I’ve way better relationships. I got married. I did well in work. I did well in sport. I don’t regret that change and yeah I miss that energy but I don’t miss being a doofus. 
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I can’t read long text…watch TV or listen to the Radio anymore. I hate showering and shaving. The negatives of these meds is killing me.
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Yeah hearing that. Add exercise. It helps. I started walking. 30 minutes a day. Do that briskly. I’m still not the sharpest tool in the shed but I get things done. I can do plans and follow through with them. Really has added to my life at 50. Wish I did it when I was diagnosed and 30.
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You know how a Tumbleweed just drifts aimlessly through the desert?
That’s me…only I’m a BumbleFukk.
Try it. Costs nothing. Gains good. Gets addictive in a good way. You have nothing to lose but but the gains are so good as you age!
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I don’t lack exercise…I’m on my feet 4hours per day at work, moving around.
Just bitter that I can’t be my old self. I feel like an imposter on these meds.
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Common feeling but we all go through it. Meds come at a cost. I’m just saying that I don’t mind that cost. My pre meds days were never good. Too much loneliness. After meds I’m so better off. Sure. I’m slower. I’m dumber. I never get out of first gear but it’s a small price to pay for some sanity to me…
No slight. Just saying what helps me and your right I don’t work for a living so I have some liberties with time you don’t .
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What meds do you take, maybe you could change them or lower the dose. Speak with your psychiatrist about what’s going on.
I feel the same
When I was crazy I couldn’t get anything done. I’d either pace the floor and mutter to the voices or I’d lie on floor staring into space. On meds I can do more as I’m more level headed - even though I get avolition it’s not as severe on meds as off them.
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Not me, I gave up everything even my family when without meds. With meds at least I can live with my family and sometimes play video games with friends.
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I’m not even going to debate or go against this. Because this was me.
I was dysfunctional too. I’ve had different types of crazies
What you’re feeling at the moment is perfectly normal. When I first began taking meds I felt exactly the same way (flat & soulless). What I didn’t know back then though was that it usually takes a good while to get used to medication. After about a year of taking meds I found that I had gradually became able to think much clearer about my life, my condition and my circumstances. I like to write and as I began to think more clearly I actually became a much better writer, and even managed to write a book (something I could have never of done before meds). Just hang in there P and if you really feel that the meds you’re taking are too strong maybe talk to a psychiatrist about taking a weaker dose. I hope that you feel better soon :^)
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