I gave up hospitalizations

I was a habitual mental ward patient. I had to quit. I acted up the last time. I couldn’t restrain myself any longer, I’d been holding it back for three decades. Do you have the same experience? I am very sick but I don’t need to go back. Ever.

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I stayed out of the hospital for 25 years then went back in 2015. The old familiar misery did nothing for me though there was a total jerk inside and it was satisfying to see a mild mannered, bespectacled guy finally flip out and attack him and beat him down.
I remember they gave me as much lemonade as I wanted. It was scary in there as usual.

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I hit a fellow patient a couple times when i stayed in the adult ward as a youngen. He was a terror though and some of the other patients thanked me. But i still feel bad. Didnt get in any trouble from it because im almost always calm and nice and everyone thought it was out of character for me. Which it was. And i was just a paranoid delusional scared kid hearing voices at the time.

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Last time i stayed in a mh ward a few years ago, i was having heaps of random outbursts of like scream-crying. Never happened before or after. Was nuts. My old pdoc thought it might have partly been because i was triggered by being back in the ward itself. Not sure she was right but who knows.
I guess It was like a nightmare the first couple times i stayed half my life ago.

Sorry am i oversharing? Sometimes i think i say too much and too much heavy stuff.

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No. Your fine. Thanks for replying.

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Okay cool thanks @Jinx :slightly_smiling_face:

I haven’t been hospitalized in years. Maybe several. Last time I went (I think) it was for stress and voluntary. It was mainly a check up. I was my grandfather’s caretaker at home and it was stressful for me as a schizophrenic…I wanted to go to school too but couldn’t seem to do it.

Today was a good day but rare event. I did a lot today.

I hope to never go back to the hospital either. I’m doing well on Vraylar.

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I don’t ever plan on going back either. It’s been a few years for me as well thankfully!!

I do worry that the hospital hasn’t given up on me.

For me, it rarely crosses my mind. It used to be a constant fear.

Not for schizophrenia. Strokes are the main concern and now there are prostate issues and Parkinson’s.

OK, sorry to hear about those. It sucks getting older but it’s better than the alternative.

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twice i was hospitalized but both times i put myself in there. it was a difficult time but i guess it helped me anyways then.

i also hope to never go back there again.

judy :heart_eyes: :innocent: :rofl: :smiling_face_with_three_hearts: :grinning:

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