I find that my fears are an obstacle for my pleasure from life?

is it true in your opinion? or the low mood has other reasons? i just want to feel my soul one day. my heart too… i am fed up of having this pain in my soul, the social anxiety too…

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@Anna1 it is difficult for me to tell what is going on with your soul.
I would love to help you, but I don’t know enough about your situation to give you sound advice.
In any case I wish that you achieve peace of mind and satisfaction with life :wink:
Erez

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hi erez, thanks for the message.
i dont feel positive emotions on fact. i guess i am hypocondriaque too. i am worried that i can die if i continue to live like an hermite. and sometimes i am just tired to fight and the despair is here in these moments…i still cant accept a life where i even cant go out to feel the air. or to have nothing. neither a family, no friends, no activities…plus, i see myself as a rubbish now, i feel guilt still…

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Why I can give you advice @Anna1 !
Now that you gave me some details I can give you advice.
Go out of the house, you appear to be at home all the time, go every day for a walk.
Plus , try to excercise, for example running, swimming, bicycle, whatever works for you.
If you are unhappy with lack of friends, try to contact associations in Bulgaria for the mentally ill, through them you can find friends.
Further, try to do something at home, try coloring, puzzles, read a bit, try to develop some hobbies.
Try to develop hobbies, try to build your life.
I send you my hugs,
Erez.

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so the meds have their limits for me? i know some friends who felt an immediate relief from them on the second day… and my bad moments are still too often and quite painful, really painful. i have paranoia often from others people. idk how i am gonna to go out with some people outside. i just have this pain in my soul and it hurts. do you really think i will forget it if i am more active? 17 years where i was inactive…

I am just scared that it will take years to recover because of my chaotic and bad past. Plus, i am tired of fighting. I get old you know…

I think that you don’t have to look at the past.
What is gone is gone, the years that passed won’t return.
Instead you can look at the future, you are still relatively young.
I understand that you have bad moments and it is painful.
Your meds might help you and might not, they act different on different people.
In any case, no matter what the med does, the med won’t live for you.
It is you who have to become more active and build your life.
If you have fears of going outside, try to overcome those fears and get outside anyway.
I believe that the more you go outside, gradually you will get used to it and have less fear of going outside.
Try to improve and follow my advice, you have the advantage that your starting
point is very low, things can only get better for you going forward.
I love you, I want you to feel better, to do more , to lead a more active life.
There is no guarantee that you can make full recovery, but surely you can get to a much better
situation than you are now.
With love,
Erez.
@Anna1

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And mu struggle to feel better in my mind just staying at home is useless you think? I wont feel better just by getting better in my thoughts, is that right? Gosh, ok, ill try to go out more often :smiley:

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Is it bad erez that i even dont want to go outside anymore? Grrh… its been years that its like this. Were you like this? I feel guilty about that so my mind is not peaceful on this side…

I think that regarding going out, it is for you to decide.
I think that it is important that you try to build your life.
I think that one component is getting out of the house.
It is nice to go outside, to breath fresh air.
You didn’t go outside for a long time from what I gather, try to go outside
and you may enjoy it.
Also going outside, you can find friends, for example you get on a bus , you talk to girls on the
bus and try to befriend them.
But going outside is not my only advice.
Another advice is try to find friends, or try to strengthen ties with existing
acquaintances if you have any, or both of them.
Also I advise that you excercise, for example run, swim, bike whatever works for you,
this way you will both be active, get out of the house and improving your health.
Also, try to develop hobbies, for example reading, solving crosswords, sudoku stuff like that.
Also try to eat healthy and watch your weight.
Do what I advise you, and trust me that you will start feeling much better.
It is clear from your posts that you feel bad about your situation and it’s normal since your situation is not good. Try to improve your situation and trust me, it will make you feel better.
I have schizophrenia, I try to do the maximum I can, my situation is not good but I excercise
every day or once every two days, I do things, I try to be active to the best of my ability.
I feel better when I am active rather than doing nothing, and I’m sure that will be true in your case as well.
I hope that my advice helps, Erez.
@Anna1

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I am tired to fight. I cant do it anymore. I am just so sad… i am fed up of my friends, they dont care about me. All my ill friends are doing better than me. I have the impression that ill die alone if being better depends on me… its unfair that everybody dumped me years ago… i cant try always to be somebody better you see??? Even when i was active i was paranoid, heavy, depressed. I hate when i have to realize that my situation is bad. What if my recovery takes years? I am 35 years old and i cant even talk anymore, you see??? Sorry for my complains, my mother says that everybody will run away from me with so much complaining…

Ill try to sleep now. Sorry for my complaints erez. One of my ill friends told me in the past that i am a hopeless case, it hurted me. I gave up fighting long ago, before my diagnosis. ,17 years ago in the fact… thank you for the spent time. Ill try to cry if i can instead of feeling my anger or depression…