I was suicidal for 20 years. My life circumstances changed finally and I want to live now. It’s not about trying to do better because it’s not your fault. Just put effort in finding this in life that make you happy, or as happy as you can manage and engage in those things regularly.
It’s true. I’ve been living in a bubble after they put me on olanzapine though. It’s like I lost touch with death and haven’t been thinking much that my time is short and that tomorrow is no given. Lately I started thinking about it though, and it’s positive in the sense that I take life more seriously.
Therapist (monthly) and Case Manager (weekly) completely took my SI seriously. Helped me make a safety plan. Listened whenever I felt it and explored why I felt it everyday. They just gave a ■■■■ and that was a big deal.
i was born about 15 years after the jewish holocaust and my parents were surv ivors. everytime i went to bed i would remind myself that i cannot lay down and die – i owed it to my parents to stay alive and do my best, this kept me from trying all kinds of things that would have destroyed me and my family. judy