I feel so guilty and scared

Because I had another dream of my ex last night and thinking of him a lot again - how it could have been with him if only I stayed with him…why oh why did I leave?..he was such a lovely person…

I feel so guilty because I’m comparing my husband to him eg. my ex and I never fought as he was so peace loving, a real hippie - and my husband and I fight so much as we both get upset easily.

I feel so guilty also, because it would hurt my dear husband if he was aware I was comparing him to my ex. And I feel guilty because I don’t want to be ungrateful to my husband who gives me so much.

I feel scared because I don’t want my husband to leave me. I’m scared I’d hurt him.

I think of my ex still because he was so like my ideal man - long haired, barefoot, peaceful, gentle, hippie. My husband is not as close to these things but he’s such a gentle and kind man too. Why should it matter that his hair is short and balding? At least he has a beautiful beard!

We don’t have to be soul mates to be married…we just need to be there for each other. Right?

Wtf is wrong with me??? Why am I so effing ungrateful? I don’t want to lose my husband over my ex (who happens to be dead since ten years ago). God help me!! I’m acting crazy…


Sounds like we have similar or same ideal men.

I love long hair and beard too.

My x had long hair to his bottom and a beard.stunning and the best man I ever met but he wouldn’t let me be vegan because he thought it would make me sick so I left to become vegan.

It was perfect with him and his dogs.
We lived in a perfect home with perfect dogs and were a perfect family.

He also used glue traps to kill mice which tortured them so I left the person I love most in the world for animals and my morals regarding animals and he is a hunter.

Could your husband grow the little hair he has long for you?

Are you sure you want to spend the rest of your life with him if you fight so much and favour another?

Companionship is lovely though but not if you fight all the time.

Maybe write three positives about your husband every day to help you appreciate his strengths.

Would you ever leave him?

Maybe things can improve.

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I feel yea, hope everything goes okay with you. best of luck.

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