Hi, my voices are integrated with my thoughts. My neck also seems to nod or shake to signal encouragement or disagreement with what im thinking.
I feel trapped and hopeless. These symptoms amplify the words people speak to me. I dont want to play the blame game but because of sz many friends just honestly, not on purpose, dont believe in me, never encourage me but seem jealous of the path i (career/academic) was previously on. Most of them have now surpased my previous potential. And make 6 figures in the usa while im back in my 3rd world country home.
Im passionate about stem and enrolled in a ttop 20 uni studying computer engineering 10 years ago. Got ill during the coursecand have not had peace ever since.
I also have visions of people that make me feel like a mean person who deserves the punishment.
End of rant. Just sharing incase anyone had similar experiences and wants to say something.
I eat healthy. Go for 3 walks a week. And do weekly strength exercises.
I followed an online course in Lifestyle Medicine for Mental Health Services a couple of months ago and it really inspired me to live as healthily as possible.
I can believe it. I was humiliated by a very powerful corporation and felt disconnected from the world. I voluntarily left tech (previously my entire world) temporarily due to competition, envy and voices frustrating my mind. I hope to resolve what hallucinations really mean to find something new to be devoted to in the world.
I was in university too and was doing very well and was planning on teaching at a university. But I got sz and had to quit. I never got to finish my degree and I was so close. I’m bitter and sad too.
I have a different life now. Never was able to have children or dogs/pets or anything like that, but I did get married and have family time and even have 3 friends. And although it is very rough because of sz, I’ve finally found good enough meds to keep me semi rational so I can function a little bit nowadays.
I hope so much that you can find good meds that help you reach a peaceful and at least semi fulfilling life. Best wishes to you.
The only meaning they have is that you have in illness that causes your mind to echo its noise back at you. Just ignore them and don’t put any energy into trying to figure them out. It is a waste of energy you can use to recover from the illness and get back to having a life.
Same here. I was enrolled in an ivy university doing a Master’s in Statistics 13 years ago.
Currently, I have been trading stocks since the last few years. I got rid of voices on Abilify like 5 years back, but I still get thoughts on and off, and need a second AP to curb those thoughts. The second AP tends to cause either problems with sex drive or weight or both or doesn’t work, so currently I started taking Ziprasidone as my second med. I am transitioning from Amisulpride to Ziprasidone while I take Abilify.
Well i read it in the John Nash book that sometimes thought and voices are integrated. Sort of like inner speech. Was just curious so never mind.
Nash was also hearing voices, voices that frightened him: “My head is as if a bloated windbag, with Voices which dispute within.” 30
Hallucinations can involve any of the senses — hearing, smell, taste, touch, sight — but voices, one or several, familiar or strange but distinct from one’s own thoughts, are the most characteristic of schizophrenia. 31 These are quite distinct from the hallucinations that are part of religious experience, or the humming inside one’s head, hearing one’s name called occasionally, or hallucinations that occur while falling asleep or waking up. The content of schizophrenic hallucinations can be benign, but they usually involve ridicule, criticism, and threats, typically related to the content of the delusional theme. The integration of voices with thought can produce an acute sense of reality.
