I expect to get a lot of hell for this

But my excitement is exciting, and I really can’t care what you might think.

I’m talking to one of my mothers exes. He went to high school with her. He’s always been very good to me, and like a father figure.

They dated in my early twenties, and even then I crushed on him hard, but nothing came of it bc I do have boundaries.

A couple years after they broke it off we both confessed mutual attraction, but we were both going through a lot and it never took off.

Now we’re talking again, and are trying to plan to see each other soon.

He’s a comforting figure, and now, when I’m having to deal with my actual father who is not good to me, it’s been a good relief to catch up with him and hear how he’s been trying to find me again for years.

And yes, I also feel awful for the obvious reasons, but I can’t not see it through.

Writing to the vitriol of the void, which I’m sure I’ll hear, and that’s ok. It’s happening regardless.

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A woman once told me you all want a dad. No offense, maybe she was revealing some female secret.

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I certainly believe it’s true for me.

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My biggest loves reminded me of my mom.

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“vitriol of the void” makes me wonder if the void is full of empty stuff like social banter or pleasantries or at least stuff that makes you feel empty, like vitriol. But I have none of that for this post.

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I was raised by a divorced woman and never had an irl dad, so I wouldn’t know about what fathers do.

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[ bites @fractaled on the ankle ]

[ hides back under couch and feels guilty about age difference ]

:flushed:

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I’d have rather had no father than the one I did. I guess I’m trying to find a better one in a lot of sense.

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You’re going to date your mother’s ex boyfriend?

That is just so wrong on sooo many levels.

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Yeah that sounds very wrong.
I wouldn’t go through with it.

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I don’t see it as that big of an issue myself. Age differences don’t really offend my sensibilities. Would not care if situation were reversed either. One of my aunts was involved with a much younger man. The fact that it was your mothers ex boyfriend does make it a little more awkward, but oh well. To each, their own.

Edit: Who does it hurt? They are both adults.

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The only problem I could detect is that you currently look at him as a father figure, that could be difficult in the relationship, having to be in a different mindset other than that, when you become romantically involved. Otherwise I hope it works out.

Weirder story is a mom remarried a guy, who had a teenage son. The daughter of the mom, also a teenager, later married her stepdads son. I mean….wow.

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I guess my view is that if you’re not genetically related and you’re both consenting adults, it’s none-o-my-biz even if it’s not my cup of tea. Hope it turns out well.

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Do what you like. My ex mrs was 8 years older than me and that worked well. I like more mature women but now I’m 50 I’d like to say opposite but probably wrong.

More power to you but do your thing which I don’t think is a problem with you.

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I hooked up with someones 16 years older than me a long time ago.

It prob not a big deal on the age but a bit odd cuz it was your moms ex.

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I think old people young people sexual relationships are stupid.

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This is a typo thats all

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People are so judgmental!

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@fractaled I’m old enough to be your stepfather, and I think you’re wicked attractive!

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Different strokes for different folks. Who cares? Your both adults and that’s that. Can’t see anything wrong really it’s up to you. You have free will in life

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