My therapist wants me to go to an outreach center through my support worker. I’ve cancelled that three times now. It’s a baby step thing for me.
If I’m meeting a friend or family for a meal or coffee I’m very careful about where we go. I have to be in a booth as far away as I can be to any other occupied table. Otherwise I get very antsy and i can’t stay long.
@Skims. Is your stress level settling down? It’s so exciting that you’re getting married this weekend!
There’s some news I missed.
Getting married !
The first I heard of it.
I can not do socialising.
I cried about it today.
So many years I isolated from my own family and parents etc
Because of delusions and paranoia etc and I was alone and even about my horse I had delusions.
Then I met my bf .
I can be with him but not his friends and family.
I usually manage the polite g’day n would you like a cofffee polite …
But dinners I can suffer too much
I can not go for coffees with people cause I go mute or feel hysteria and I feel someone else in my body so my body stiffens and I can not handle it.
Thankfully I am back in contact with my family somewhat but we live pretty far away from each other,
I live in the house of my dad. As a subtenant. Everyone here is Polish. I myself was born in Poland, but there was only the first two years of my life and otherwise only there for Christmas every few years to visit there.
My Polish is very bad, meanwhile I can say a few simple things. I grew up in Germany, I’m a German, Polish is just my family. I can talk to these people very little or not at all.
In the house of my father, his employees from Poland live here for four to eight weeks to work with him on construction sites.
None of them can understand German properly or even talk. And everything that happens after work here is just drinking alcohol. I used to be one of those when I was new. I also drank a bit. But now I avoid going to these people. I always stay in my room and usually only see me when I get out, when my father grills.
The people are nice to me though.
Is probably because my father is the boss here. If they did not drink that much then it would be nice.
I’m guessing everyone here is more on the introverted part of the spectrum? Myself included
I only got out if I need to (like the shops) or to the library.
Otherwise I’m very happy to stay home all day
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