I dont have an opinion on almost everything, what is this gosh?

I am afraid to be like this. I have no political views, neither moral ones etc etc… one pdoc said that I am borderline. but maybe, its my disintegrated personality because of the sz… what do I lack to be like this? a mood maybe? I am afraid now, really. I cant continue to live like an animal between 4 walls. sometimes I think that god punished me with this illness, I hope I am not right…

in fact now I try to decrease my Depakote. its possible that this med is not the right one for me. maybe it messes me more than I think. I have the doubt that Zyprexa makes me feel so bad… Depakote is for mania but I never had a mania. I just take it because Ive cried too much in front of my pdoc. but whatever, I feel like ■■■■ on it. I cant think I find,really, I am lazy on it and its more that I can handle,really… it is for epileptics also which I am not and its not nice to take a med for epileptics when you are not a one… maybe I cant feel the good effect of Zyprexa now because my Depakote is too much? ill try with a small dose of Depakote, that’s what ill do. I never tried that.
hugs

try look in at https://www.drugs.com/medical_conditions.html to find a new drug that works well with you. Hope this help, and best wishes.

Don’t do anything without the cooperation of your doctor @Anna1

oh come on everhopeful, I was always reasonable in my illness. my pdoc thought that maybe I have hallucinations because I told her that I hear how my mom is talking on the phone in the another room. and it was a fact, I never had hallucinations. I dont lose my mind…never…ill try this, it doesn’t help me really. this Depakote is not good when you hadn’t mania ever :confused: .

Same here. Most days I feel like a prisoner being violently tortured by my illness. I have a very intelligent illness, it seems.

yeah @Lexicon its strange… me too I dont feel intelligent because of all this… plus, I try to remain a good person but with all my lack of good mood I look evil wow…

Some people might view that as a deficit, but I get tired of a lot of people who are strident in their beliefs. I think whatever happens will happen regardless of our beliefs.