I didn’t realize how much I want to and how much time I wasted thinking I could.
I think Rumi said when I was young I wanted to change the world, when I grew old I changed myself. It’s hopeful knowing that the source of my power is within and by being in touch with that I can be a force for good in the world. Life is an inside job.
Perhaps maybe just help one or two people.
I have a friend who has been severely borderline and violent for decades. I almost gave up on our friendship because it seemed hopeless that she would improve her toxic behavior. She will never be free from living in a group home but she recently has been extremely grateful to me for staying friends for over twenty years. I learned a lot about my own anger in the process of witnessing her bouts of expressing rage.
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