I am Psychotic

I am not completely sure when it started but I have been thinking things are gods sign.

I have been thinking especially during falling asleep stages that I am being spoken to.

It always comes down to religion and a Christianity vs me thing. This theme is recurring.

For some reason this was common for sardar an inpatient in my first and second hospitalisations.

The theme of being attacked by satellite or in wall technology or aerials is recurring.

I will go tomorrow to buy abilify / aripiprazole as I’m out.

Is this going to save me though? Because the voices were only audible in the sleep situations

Otherwise I’ve had rare cases of them being audible in the faintest as feelings within and the idea of nanotechnology being used to infiltrate my body is back again.

(Right idk if I’m being seen as serious here but, I’m in danger of psychosis - there’s no other way what is going on is not psychosis - I don’t know why I appear sound mind - I am definitely paranoid - I am trying to be logical and balance my thinking with as many juxtaposed thoughts to the thoughts I have with whatever sense of self I have)

I feel the Internet is the cause of a lot of my problems. Either god punishing me in an easy way through psychosis or I’m legit being attacked from somewhere with sophisticated means

The next thing that that’ll happen is I’ll be super focused on who’s a sociopath and who’s not. Who’s god guided and who’s not. And a lot of other stupid things.

Is thought reversal a thing? Is mind control (self induced) and thing? These things have to be real because there’s not many other ways for me to justify that it is neurologically possible to out do psychosis.

(Allah, god, yhwh you’re either autistic or you’re a psychopath - give my mind back please)

Sorry for the long post. What is my course of action?

Get abilify / aripiprazole as soon as I get wake up the day next after I finish work? or is this dangerous to work with? Because I don’t believe this is dangerous to work with.

People may pick up behaviour change because I myself felt behaviourally different yesterday. Idk if anyone picked up on it.

I had written a resignation letter last month. I could format it into a request for absence letter and give it to the manager by sending him a message on phone explaining what seems to be real to me or true to me.

My biggest priory right now, is to not withdraw from my course, or to suspend it In time for me not to fall into the repayment entitlement timing because it would stop future funding.

Yes im sorry if I am revealing a selfish or self centred person at the moment. But that is what we inherently are. For the sake of unity.

So you weren’t on a medication? I’m a bit confused.

Your mental health is most important right now imo.

Try and reduce your stress load

Sorry to hear your psychotic.

I don’t believe in God anymore. It helps me have a clearer mind. Sometimes I feel guilty about that cos of my parents strong belief in God. Especially when I said it out loud on this public forum! But when I move out I’ll fully experience the benefit.

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Finished the meds box.

I don’t know if it’s fair to say mind is like this but could it be that I can deal with things if I think in different ways - or is this a self delusion that I know what I am doing? Grandeur and so on.

I am being hundred percent genuine and honest but I feel like a poser. I also haven’t been involved with drugs of any kind for at least two years.

This is stress induced. I don’t mind stress though.

I do mind spiritualism. I’m a “this is a free world” believer of god.

I can text a care co ordinator?

It’s easier to live in the world if you chose not to want to have anything to do with god. I would advise religion is not a good idea for anybody that doesn’t believe in an afterlife. (Answering your discussion)

Yes defo do that call your care Co ordinator to prevent a full blown episode… Best wishes to you… If you don’t get a response go to a n e… They always have a mental health person there on call…

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