i still close myself even from insolence… when somebody is pissed of by my words, i am afraid even of this… i hope this will pass. i try not to think negatively now, the meds didnt kick in still. they are almost no help for me till now. just 20 days that i am on them but i know now that what i have is serious.
otherwise, i proposed to my mother to cook for myself from now… cause i have a lot of free time, i am not pissed of by cooking still and i should try myself to beat the negative symptoms. most of the pdocs are saying that we should "move’’ ourselves to beat them 
i still feel depersonalizated,its tough, i cant love by a more sane way but thats my situation now,it could change, maybe…
i think i am quite autistic also. more than some other schizophrenics… i am really closed for others and afraid of them wow,its sucks 
I think it will, it did for me. It’s only natural to feel that way for a while as you feel pretty vulnerable when you are recovering from psychosis.
Already you’re going to try to cook for yourself, so I’d say that’s recovering too.
I’ve been told I have Ausburgers indicators but I’m starting to not believe that because I now think that I was so closed off from everyone (suicidal depression from almost day one) that the severe depression is what was halting my social growth. That makes me say that maybe it’s the psychosis that’s stopping you from interacting, especially if you were able to interact normally before.
It took about 3 months for my meds to work when I first went on them. The meds keep you sane, and you sound sane to me, so I’d say they’re working.
Give the rest some time.
I’m a guy, and I am exactly the same way. I sometimes take ■■■■ from guys I really don’t need to. I could handle them easily in a fight. I shy away from confrontation, and I get psyched out easily. Another problem I have is learning the ordinary tasks in the workplace, and sometimes at home. I psych out easily for that too. I don’t know how to run a cash register. The only thing I know about a computer is to point and click. The standardized tests say I’m relatively smart, but I sure don’t see any evidence of it in daily life.
yeah, i know. people get emotional,its inevitable… what a disease, it screws our lives…i cant take pleasure at anything,i cant love anymore… its hard but for now its less painfull when i am on meds… one more sz friend made a crises two months ago. she was on a small dose of clozapine but even besides that she made a crisis… but she makes in the positive symptoms… they should be hard too though… i hope things will change. i dont know if ill stay forever alone, it s a probability whit all that i have :/…
take care crimby, see you soon here on the forum 
“No one can take your self importance away from you. Accept yourself.” Dr Abraham Low, founder of the first CBT group in the 30’s. I remember that when someone sells me short. As for simple tasks at home and in the workplace, we suffer from “cognitive deficits”, the term they use today. You probably know that. Also, “low sensory gating”, a term they use to describe being easily distracted…
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