How Your First BF/GF Shapes You

My very first girlfriend didn’t like sex, and we always argued. We lasted about 18 months.

Because of her I felt all women hated sex and were belligerent. She really screwed up my perspective on women. But that thankfully changed when I started dating other women afterwards.

Did your first relationship mess you up?

Not sure how long we dated, I was 15 she was 21, was when I first started drinking so was drunk a lot. I got in with older people and looking back it was a mistake, sent me down all the wrong roads

No, forget that chick. She was into herself and only herself.

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When I first had sex, my gf was virgin. We both were virgin. It was sweet


That’s awesome, I always wanted an experience like that.


Strangely though, this gal tried to hook up with me again a few years ago. She was all wistful about how we had such a great relationship.


She was recently divorced and had a checkered dating history after me…or so my other friends told me.

The man I’m with now is my first and only partner. We have been together 13 years now on 31st August.

We’ve been through a lot together but we’ve stayed strong. We influence each other in a positive manner.

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My gf didn’t shape me…I don’t think you can shape ppl after they’re an adult.

I was still a teenager during my first relationship. My girlfriend skewed my view of women. I wish we had never dated.

My first real boyfriend spat in my face…

Good times :upside_down_face:.

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The first guy I dated asked me to marry him after two months together.
We married in 5 months, and stayed together for 25 years.
After the divorce we were even better friends, even both our (new) spouses get along good-no drama.


man my first girlfriend was all about fashion. she was always shopping, this was when i was 16. and i remember she liked to go to dance clubs without me, which i thought she was playing the field. anyways it lasted about 6 months, and then thankfully ended, i wasn’t upset it ended. a lot of guys thought she was hot, but really i had feelings for another friend of mine. last i heard she lives in l.a. now trying to be famous or something. she contacted me a few years ago, and i just blew her off. it was a typical adolescent relationship where neither person was really right for the other.

My first boyfriend, at age 20, was abusive. I only put up with it for four months, then decided relationships were exactly as awful as I predicted they would be. I tried dating a good friend afterwards, and he was nice enough, but I could tell his heart wasn’t in it. He knew I was a catch, and wanted to love me, but he just didn’t. That hurt, because I genuinely loved him. I tried dating another friend shortly after that, but I knew from the beginning it wouldn’t last. He had a history of jumping from relationship to relationship, and when I could see him starting to line up his next relationship, I dumped him before he could dump me.

These three relationships happened in pretty quick succession. They made me think that only abusive people would want me, and decent people would get bored of me. So I decided to stay alone, and only do first dates occasionally when the loneliness got too bad. Mr. Star was a fluke. I fully intended to meet him once, have a good first date, then scare him off. But he was unscareable. He kept coming back for more, which made me absolutely confused. It took a good 4 years to believe he actually wanted to stay with me long term.

I had always desperately wanted a loving relationship, but I just thought it was unattainable for a long time. I’m glad I was wrong.


I met my first girlfriend when I was 20. We got together about a year later, but I think it was a mistake looking back. None of us had really been with anyone else before, and I guess I kind of thought I was supposed to succeed with my first relationship. Unfortunately we were like oil and water, argued most of the time. We went on a little break, then got back together. Suddenly she met another guy before she broke up with me. I remember calling her one weekend when she didn’t come home, and she just explained casually that she was with another guy. Broke my heart, and it took me a long time to recover from that. Bad memories. At least now I have a better understanding about what it takes to make a realtionship work.

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My first real bf was from Saudi Arabia. Our cultures were very different. He treated me like crap.

My first boyfriend taught me a lot about what I did and didn’t want in a relationship.

I guess that’s what they’re for.

I’ve been with my husband for thirteen years now and we’ve had some rocky spots, but always make it work.

We’re in a rough patch now, but I see us coming out on the other end.


Uhhh I think it made me more cautious to get really attached to people because I got blindsided. In my eyes we were madly in love with each other and then out of the blue he dumped me for another girl. I just didn’t see it coming at all, he didn’t become less affectionate, I didn’t notice him talking with the other girl more, etc.

So I guess I became very cautious of love that seemed pure. It took me a long time to trust my current bf and even then I sometimes worry he will just get tired of dealing with my crap.


I was abused physically and mentally in my first “relationship.” It definitely shaped me, but I have been working on not letting it affect me as much, and that not everyone is the same.

Are the trust issues still there? Absolutely, as I dont know if I will ever trust someone enough to get married. I hope can trust someone enough one day, but it’ll take a special person.

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