Schizophrenia.com

How well do you handle arguing

#1

Hi this thread is how people with a mental illness handle stressful social interactions.

How do you feel when someone calls you a name?

Does arguing make you feel edgy?

Would or have you ever lost your cool?

We’re you ever at your edge about to crack?

How did you calm yourself when handling irritating people?

How do you settle an argument peaceably?

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#2

I need to learn to walk away from an argument. I always regret my anger and big loud arrogant mouth. Im planning to tackle these anti social issues I have by going to Recovery International…The healing power of the Lord will guide me.

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#3

If they call me a name I usually think they are right. I guess I don’t handle it well, and I usually try to avoid arguments.

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#4

Before anger management classes… Yes, I got edgy, I have completely lost my cool, I have swung the stupid punch, I usually never calmed myself, I had to just end up passing out from exhaustion because I would ruminate on the situation until the cows came home and all the next few days after, I could never settle an argument peaceably.

After the classes the therapy and growing up a bit…

I don’t let names bother me anymore. I just ignore it, I do still feel edgy but I walk away long before I’m about to loose it. I calm myself by taking a step back and focusing on what’s around me, like an interesting stick or a flower. I usually handle irritating people by tuning them out, changing the topic three of four times in a row, and walking away.

Many times I’ll just apologize just to shut the person up. I don’t hold fast and firm enough to any of my beliefs that I feel I have to fight about them. I believe what I believe and if you disagree… that is fine by me.

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#5

i hear a raised voice and im in fight or flight.

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#6

Actually being in an argument bothers me less than listening to one. I walk away from an argument when the opponent is reduced to lying and it’s just their word against mine. When it’s someone else’s argument, there’s nothing I can do about it and I feel helpless as well as upset.

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#7

I can’t stand the heat in an argument. Usually I’ll say what I have to say and split.

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#8

I win arguments…people don’t really argue with me unless they’re drunk, and then it just takes them forever to comprehend what I am saying. But I still win the argument.

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#9

i walk away from confrontation, my wife tells me if i ever hit someone i would kill them, so i walk.
take care

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#10

Are you always right?

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#11

yeah, only drunks argue with me…

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#12

Why doesn’t anyone else argue with you?

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#13

How do you feel when someone calls you a name?
alarmed, anxious, scared

Does arguing make you feel edgy?
I am not sure what edgy means, but I try to avoid arguments, I am not one to argue back

Would or have you ever lost your cool?
I have done a few… rage typical things during episodes, but normally because I feel compelled to do them not because I am angry.

We’re you ever at your edge about to crack?
Frequently when I am too stressed or if I start to feel really uncomfortable: around large groups of people or in a room alone with a male would be a few examples.

How did you calm yourself when handling irritating people?
I try to remove myself from the situation or retreat inside myself.

How do you settle an argument peaceably?
As long as the conversation remains calm and civil I will discuss the topic to resolution, however if things get loud, angry or really emotional, i try to escape

I am a very shy and easily scared. I don’t make a habit of putting myself in situations where I have a high chance of dealing with aggressive behaviors; to be honest I spend a great deal of energy avoiding it. I use to be very confident and strong but more and more I am constantly terrified and on alert. Jumping at loud sounds, always listening and observing what is going on around me, judging people based on what level of threat I feel they pose to me, and surveying a room for exits and defensive positions. I keep very specific routines that are carefully calculated to reduce the possibility of conflict and I favor isolation. I eat my lunch at work alone and away from people. I am alert of everyone who walks by my desk, I avoid being touched, I go straight to work, and straight home. It is difficult to convince myself to go outside my house for much of anything. But I am walking to the pond some evenings when there is nobody there to sketch. Other than my fiancee and my 2 friends I don’t socialize much.

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#14

How do you feel when someone calls you a name? I usually completely agree. When I was hearing voices he would just keep repeating the name calling and put me down.

Does arguing make you feel edgy? Yes, its so uncomfortable.

Would or have you ever lost your cool? Yes I have in the past but not anytime recently. I’ve mellowed over the years.

We’re you ever at your edge about to crack? Yes.

How did you calm yourself when handling irritating people? I try to empathize or put myself in their situation to try and figure out why they are acting the way they are.

How do you settle an argument peaceably? Agree to disagree.

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#15

This explains precisely what I don’t like about my wife’s Pentecostal religious services. I used to accompany her to church and learn from the experience… until she became Pentecostal. They certainly do raise their voices!!

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#16

errify me too more so that they might eat me LOL

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#17

I don’t handle arguments well, I usually run away to a place I can be alone and have urges to cut myself. But fortunately the person I argue with most of the time - my husband - is good at resolving them asap and we tend to argue less nowadays. If somebody calls me names I soak it in and call myself them as well. I am very violent towards myself but never towards others - all the anger I take out on myself.

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#18

My mom’s church was like that too, I wanted to run out of the building! Freaky!!! :smile:

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#19

I dont do well in argument. I used to win if i was competing with anyone. After med my quick thinking is gone. But since i reduced the dose it kind of improved but not as good as before med.

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#20

I handle arguing well. There are several adjustments mentally that a person could make to handle arguments.

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