I am thinking its a symptom of brain damage.
Reading is great for improving empathy, I think. Both fiction and nonfiction are good; whatever you prefer.
Do you have a favorite character, when you watch TV shows? You almost certainly empathize with them, no?
Have you tried reading fanfiction, and intentionally choosing stories about characters that you donāt particularly care for, to challenge yourself a bit?
With the people around you, offline, try more active listening.
I dont read since I got sz. I tried but couldnāt focus on books. Before sz I read some novels. Maybe I should try more.
if and when you return to the outside world, these forum days may serve you well. Youāre a smart guy and the world is filled with more people than it is colleges or jobs or achievements. My hope for you is that your challenges only strengthen your resolve and that you may have a compassionate heart for others. I will pray for you today, Aziz
You definitely should.
My advice: You could start with shorter books, and work your way back to reading longer ones.
Sometimes, I have issues, and I grab a couple childrenās books, just so I can finish reading something.
Thanks @gene
15
If that is the definition for empath then I am empathic. Iāve read things on this forum and felt bad for that person, and I donāt even really know anyone on this forum. Same with real life. Iāve even felt bad for people that are not good people, but simply because of something hard they had to go through.
Oddly enough Iāve never been a super emotional person, I think my greatest negative symptom is āthe flat effectā and I have had comments in real life that I am not a feeling/emotional person. At the same time I am not cold and distant either. I guess emotionally neutral may be the best way to describe it. But I sometimes find myself feeling bad for a lot of people for some reason.
Me, too, @Headspark, Iām also not all that great with emotions. Monitoring emotions objectively is something that works for me. If angered, I vent. If I feel sad, I watch an uplifting movie. If restless, I exercise. Getting rid of unwanted feelings and emotions can be very difficult. We self-medicate, are promiscuous, gamble, these are all very bad. It is important to offset unwanted feelings and emotions in a healthy and safe manner. this is called self-care.
Just to add, then there is what we call harm reduction. Basically it says that it is ok to respond poorly to a feeling or emotion. We may have layers upon layers of emotion that you canāt just say, I feel sad, Iām going to watch a movie to feel happy. Sometimes the drug or need for something (overeating, for example) is the option we choose.
Harm reduction tells us that if we engage in ābadā behavior, to say āI get it, and I will ride alongside you.ā If you self-medicate, hereās a od kit and some chocolate. If you are promiscuous, make sure you have protection and a bottle of mouthwash. If you are homeless, eventually Iād like to give you a placemat.
It just comes from a place of non-judgement. Iāve been told many times over, drugs are bad. if you do them, you are bad. Not necessarily so.
Itās not that I am bad with emotions or donāt know how to handle them, its that I donāt experience them all that deeply, that is what āthe flat effectā is. Just emotionally flat most of the time, emotionally neutral.
I donāt do anything self destructive. I donāt use any substances. I havenāt had a drink in 17 years, I havenāt smoked in 13 years and I canāt remember the last time I smoked weed but itās been years too. I donāt gamble either, I get no thrill from it because Iāve studied statistics in school and I know rationally that the odds of winning are very low, so I find it boring. Iām not promiscuous either, I am scared of diseases or getting a woman pregnant.
@Headspark: Thatās great to hear that youāve gotten a handle on all those things, the cigs, drink, and drug are not easy ones to overcome. Good on you.
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