I have a somewhat unusual belief structure - it’s not really at the point of delusion and I can hold myself pretty separate from it - that I’ve noticed a few people on here share. As much as I feel the urge to connect with them about it, my policy is to not mention it out of concern for hindering my recovery and the recovery of the other members.
It’s pretty tough sometimes, though. How do you guys handle this sort of thing?
For me, it all depends on the approach. If I see someone struggling with, say, thoughts of being a demon who kills people, I like to share my past struggles with that topic, so they know that I know where I’m coming from. Then, I tell them what I do to challenge the delusion.
If it is someone who has already recovered from their delusion, I sometimes like to mock our past selves. Making fun of old delusions helps me to remember that they are ridiculous, and not worth dwelling over.
My delusions and separation of reality include leaving the country - so I just take a few moments and just think about pros and cons - weigh them together and just realize the truth. It takes time and is back and forth but helps me.
Am I really someone important?
If so - why nobody is mentioning it to me. Why things have not changed yet?
HUGS and take it easy. Usually you need a med change or increase, imo
I don’t subscribe to the idea that not talking about it makes it go away faster. Plenty of people talk about their delusions and their delusions get better at the same rate they would have anyway. I like my therapist because he agrees with that philosophy. I respect if you choose not to talk about it and feel as though it helps your recovery. I am perfectly capable of not talking about my delusion and most of the time don’t during most of my life, but it’s still there whether I talk about it or not. It helps me to be able to come here and talk about anything. I don’t feel punished for being MI. That’s one of the great things about this site. If you did choose to talk about it, I (personally) don’t think it would hinder your recovery but I respect your position on it.
Some things I’ll talk about quite freely - my most recent traumatic delusion was that I killed my cat in many many different ways. He died of kidney failure at 19, but I believed I ran over him with a car, starved him to death, let him be savaged by coyotes, poisoned him - someone just had to mention how a cat was killed and I’d believe I had done that to my cat.
I also believed that he was angry at me for killing him and not being worthy of his devotion. I believed that I needed to get another kitten and do absolutely everything right, everything I should have done for my first cat, and then if I did it well enough, my first cat would agree to come back to life.
Even when I knew better, it didn’t matter at all, because I believed all of it. It was a relief to let go of the idea that I had killed my cat, but very tough to come to terms with the fact that I couldn’t convince my cat to come back. This delusion cost me over $15,000 in the course of a year.
Honestly, I don’t see any problem with talking about delusions. The problem is in deliberately trying to dwell in them, in valuing them over reality. That’s where you can lose track and damage your chances at recovery.
My question is really about the second idea. For example (and this is not the case), let’s say I believed that there were many brain studies much like your delusion, and that I believed I knew of institutes that ran them, and I thought I understood the technology to make them possible. You can see how it would be incredibly harmful to approach you with these beliefs, right?
My unusual belief system is like that. I believe some things that tie into what other people here experience, and it’s difficult to keep my mouth shut with those people. So I was wondering how people coped with that problem.
I understand what you are saying completely and I think it is very mature and responsible of you to care about the people on here (along with helping yourself). I can only speak for myself but people could talk about as much as they wanted that may relate to or not relate to my delusion and it wouldn’t budge it one way or the other. Now, that may not be the case for other people. I may read delusions or truths about brain studies etc and it does not add fuel to my fire even if it validates my delusion in some way. It is, however, nice to know that other people have similar delusions (like being watched for example) it makes me not feel so alone. Others have had these notions too. I don’t know the stats on others but that’s how it works for me. On that note, I also (as part of my brain study delusion) believe in false memories (like you) that I know didn’t happen. It helps to know others have these false memories too and does not make me believe in mine any more than I already did.
Hey @Rhubot. Can you be more specific about your attitudes towards these beliefs or ideas? I figure from what you write that you at least occassionally think about these contents, at times perhaps triggered by others here speaking about similar stuff. To have some content in mind though is not necessarily to believe. It is very well possible, of course, that to regularly have a similar thought will result in one endorsing it. For this one needs to subscribe to these contents, endorse them. Since you call these topics part of your belief structure, you might endorse them. Or do so at some times, while not doing so at other times - i don’t know. Clearly, you are aware that they are unusual. I’m trying to wrap my head around your stance towards these contents, since you speak of them being not quite delusions, and separating yourself from them. Are they there, quietly and comfortably in the background, or do you regularly wrestle with them, as in, trying to get rid of these contents by dismantling or debunking etc.?
The encounter, and the sharing of these troublesome contents can go two ways, I think it’s important to note. You for one, have identified these beliefs as troublesome - I think I gathered that much - and others might as well have. It could very well be the case that you two can help each other dismantle these beliefs - if they are to be called that way in the first place, or share ways to deal with it. It is not the case that validation is the only possible outcome of the encounter - if it were, it would be wrong to call it validation anyway.
This right here. They don’t bother me at all. The beliefs are there but are harmless to me - I believe them but I’m not compelled by them or preoccupied by them. This is why I don’t really call them delusions, even though they’re fixed beliefs with plenty of evidence against them - they don’t alter the shape of my world in any meaningful sense. I don’t find them troublesome in the slightest, though they find basically no acceptance with people in general.
They are, however, very troublesome to some of the other people here who share these beliefs, whose lives are wrapped around them and who attribute disturbing phenomena to them. It’s clear that reinforcing these beliefs would be harmful.
I don’t know. The obvious answer is to continue not to talk about them. The compulsion is strong, though, whenever it comes up. I just figured that people may have similar experiences - a fixed, non-traumatic belief in alien visitations, for example, or a belief that god chats with them now and then but issues no distressing commands.
I really like it when people share their delusions/fixed beliefs and they are similar to mine. In some way it makes me feel less crazy knowing other people are having similar experiences and helps me see it as part of the illness.
During my psychosis I thought God spoke to me and singled me out as someone special. I genuinely believe I am close to God. When I come on here and read about people with the same or similar delusions it helps me break down the delusion because it makes me less special. When I hear of similar delusions that are slightly different it also helps because I think we can’t all be right about the same thing.
Hearing people share that information has been incredibly helpful to me.
Ha old souls share similar delusions…I have been trying to not speak on certain things…some things on occasion is OK…some just reading someone else post about other things compels me to reply usually I win and don’t…but sometimes it slips…working on it…
old souls have slayed many foes in their minds eye…they may not be real but that’s the nature of our common foe…tangibility from nothing…each one is diff but all shall be treated the same…for what they are…imaginary lines connecting concepts of our own design…this is why I connect with my veeking ancestors…stand and fight your foes these battles are for you alone…Valhalla is earned through blood and tears…us Sz have earned our places…
I see what you’re saying now, and I agree that talking about them could be harmful to others. When I run into otherwise rational people who genuinely believe in some of my more damaging delusions, it makes it harder for me to dismiss them. This is part of the problem I’ve been having with my belief about Syrian internment camps, for example. The mainstream media and many of my friends unintentionally encourage the delusion by saying they have similar beliefs. Those beliefs don’t negatively impact their lives, but they do impact mine.
I’m surprised you can still watch the news…I look for things that arnt there connections that don’t belong…and yes it makes it worse when Normie’s talk about things…they are able to place the info into a box and its just info to them…but with us it turns to monsters not their fault but annoying…
I agree wholeheartedly with this! Hearing normal people talk about distressing things on the news is a major trigger for me. Mr Turtle’s dad is the absolute worst for doing this. It doesn’t matter how many times, and how forceful Mr Turtle is when he tells him to shut up about it, he just continues on his ignorant way.