Honest thoughts from a person of colour

Lounge
1

As you know, there’s a lot of racism in some countries and I’m a person of colour. I’m Asian.

I’ve thought about moving to Canada due to my trauma that I’ve experienced in my home country, but I’m not sure- I know that there is a lot of racism, which I’ve experienced, and as a person of colour I don’t know if I would feel safe in another country. I need to finish my degree, which I will get it done, but I don’t know if I want to settle in there.

Sometimes, I wish I was white. I wouldn’t get a person making an “Asian eye” look on their face when they see me (some people still do this apparently) or make fun of my race. I don’t want to look as if I am inferior because of the color of my skin, or made fun of because I’m Asian.

I’m just like, why would I want to abandon my country and move to a completely new place? I’ve lived in Korea my whole life and it’s a great country.

But I’m afraid of the people here because the trauma won’t go away. I can’t make friends. I can’t handle relationships without getting paranoid. I can’t escape the thought of “no one wants me anywhere because I’m schizophrenic” and I just want to isolate forever.

I feel like I’m a lost sheep. I have nowhere to go to- there’s always some hatred in places.

I feel like I need to get over this ■■■■ and deal with the relationship issues and live here, or deal with racism and live abroad. Since COVID-19 cases increased, people think I’m a living virus overseas apparently and that’s why I cancelled my offer of acceptance at a university.

I just want to say, thank you for all forum members who still stand beside me despite my race and my shortcomings, and my frequent complaints about low self-esteem. It’s so difficult right now and the news has been really flaring up my symptoms. I just hope that the world can be a safer place after all this ■■■■ goes down. Also, #blacklivesmatter.

8 Likes
2

I’m a rainbow too.

#I’marainbow

2 Likes
6

Are you independent and able to live on your own? I am not. I suggest you to stay with your family so they can help you. I am in Canada and I must say that its a nice country, way better than my natal country, Syria.

2 Likes
8

If you’re Asian, and in Korea…doesn’t that make you the ethnic majority? Who is going around being racist to koreans in korea?

9

I was basically talking about my experiences in Canada. I don’t face racism here in Korea.

I was abused here in Korea so I just have a hard time trusting people in my country. It’s a great country to live in- I just wish I could trust people!

10

I am glad that you are with your family in Canada. Yes, that’s part of the reason why I want to stay here. I wish they were more supportive though.

To add: I am independent in most regards.

1 Like
11

If you apologize for being transphobic, and then turn around and act transphobic again, your apology means nothing.

12

Oh I’m sorry I was confused.

I wish you had a better time in Canada, those people I hear are pretty kind. I guess that only goes towards white people.

13

I have no problem with trans people. Your problem with me stems from your own guilt. Now I shall kindly decline to further reply for the time being. Gosh, I have much to say but I do not want to be offensive.

14

You might love Canada! What about the US? There is prejudice everywhere you just have to be strong and stand up for what you believe in. Canada prob. has better programs and healthcare right now. It’s a struggle to get support in the US as far as income inequality and disabilties. I hope it gets better and that people stop being bias against welfare programs/programs to help support people who otherwise don’t have opportunities. Some people have a strong bias against the government helping people in poverty or with disabilities. They forget that the people in the US ARE the government and that we have a right to the pursuit of happiness. And we need to take our gov. back…

Sometimes I feel helpless it’s hard to be a political activist and also have schizophrenia. My mom can’t participate in peace or civil disobedience as much or go to protests because of her health issues. One reason I was treatment resistant was because I believed I had a right not to be forcibly medicated.

15

There’s a lot of racism where I live, too. My boyfriend is colored and it’s very tangible. He gets treated in ways I have never been treated.

16

@anon9798425 is saying “colored” ok where you live? It’s considered offensive in the USA.

1 Like
17

Yes, it is. I usually say “people with a darker skin color” in my language, though. I didn’t know it was offensive, sorry. English is my second language, as you know. Should I say person of color? Or is there some better word?

1 Like
18

I wasn’t trying to fuss at you, I honestly wondered if it was ok there because different countries, different culture.

We say People or Person of color here now. That’s the blanket term for all colors not caucasian. For the US we also say African American, Latin American, etc.

3 Likes
19

No, I know. It’s interesting because when I thought about it now, I can’t actually remember having heard people say the word that I just used on TV for a long time, except in old recordings. Thanks for letting me know. I really don’t want to use offensive words.

2 Likes
20

No problem. Last year I used the R word to describe my daughter, not in a mean way but “mentally R”. I didn’t realize it was outdated.

2 Likes
21

I did that once, too. I still see people using it that way, but I stopped and realized how offensive it was when it was pointed out to me.

1 Like
22

Same. Though I understand now that the word is still in use in other languages. I only get offended when an English perso or American uses it as an insult.

2 Likes
23

Yes, we actually use a longer equivalent of that word. But it’s considered the non-offensive option when it’s not shortened. Maybe it will be changed soon.

1 Like
24

I use the word minority but I don’t know if it is offensive to say anymore.

1 Like