History is holding me back

DX'd - Other
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I’m Living with schizophrenia for more than ten years. Sometimes doctors says it is mania. It was hard to accept the new reality and I started to wonder about mental unfit people I know in all my life. I kept asking myself. Do i look like them. will i be dirty like them. The situation was complex, I believed that the community is against my reaction to what i called homosexuality conspiracy against young men global. I believed that the religions have been hacked by conspirators.

The reason why I’m writing this is just to hear your reaction on my current condition. i’m in medication for almost 3 years now and nothing bad with that. The problems with my parents. They don’t allow me to use my talents and skills to earn life. They keep saying the situation is not good enough for me to live my life without their help. What they want is to see me me close to their eyes and when I want to explore opportunities they are reminding me about actions I did when I was unfit. They are blaming me that I always bring misfortune to the family. I’m making them sick and poor
Now I planning to go to town. They requested me to write a treaty with them with one condition. If I travel then I then I’m not supposed to ask the for help in future, I have to be on my own.
I hate to be blamed for resistance I made when I relapsed…blamed for the cost they have spent.
I just can’t understand why history is holding me back

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Hard to pick out what’s wrong if you have ten years of history and multiple family members.

There are obviously trust issues here, and trust takes time to renew if it’s been broken. Small and consistent actions can work wonders. Having a pill box out in the open, chores, curfews, and a decent personal hygiene routine all help demonstrate you are responsible.

Of course the following advice assumes you have caregivers with your best interest in mind. If they don’t, I suggest going to a support group where you can go into detail, like Nami

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Thanks bro, I’m responsible person, I just hate the fact that I cannot pursue my life dreams because somebody have to make decisions on my behalf.

All I want is to lead my life

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