Hello, I’m new here

Yeah they know. I don’t know what goes into deciding the dosage. I just do what I’m told because I trust my therapist and psychiatrist at least. It’s helping a little bit; I don’t feel quite as anxious and the beings did formulate into one being for a while to mess with me (at least they say it was to mess with me, but I think it’s because the medication made them weaker), but now they’re back and they just try to frustrate and confuse me. They just devote more of their time to escaping my thoughts and inducing hallucinations.

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Yeah. A lot of the beings think I should stop taking the medication because it’s destroying my mind. I don’t know. I feel like it’s awfully convinient, and my friend suggested to me that maybe the beings are saying this because the medication makes things more difficult for them. It’s difficult to ignore the beings sometimes (actually most of the time) though.

Your friend is right! The medication is there to help you through the hallucinations and make it easier to feel better. :slight_smile: I’m sure this whole battle thing is really stressful for you, and i bet with school you don’t need that right now.

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welcome to here…

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Thank you! :smile: I haven’t always thought this way, though I’ve always been different and I’ve always known that something about this world was off. The beings have an answer for everything. God put them in my subconscious mind and they had to work to reach my conscious mind. It took them about 19 years, from the time my brain fully developed to last December. That makes sense.

Yeah, I’m not doing very well in school right now, even though I need to graduate high school to complete my mission. Some of the beings oppose the mission is the thing, so they’re making things difficult, confusing, trying to sabotage me. It’s really difficult to focus on my work, to the point where I’ve just kinda stopped trying.

Definitely don’t stop trying! It’ll be tough, but make sure you keep up with the support network you have available at school so you can get some help to keep up with your class work.

I’ve been trying but my mom thinks school is the most important thing. I tried dropping just one AP class and my mom gave me a lecture about giving up too easily.

Okay, there is no shame in switching from AP to a regular class. Your mom is wrong about that.

Yeah, my mom hates me. I mean, the beings say that, but it’s not just some sects of them who say this; they all do, and I agree with them.

the beings are your subconscious talking…

Just be careful listening to them. Sometimes they can really hurt you

Welcome, there are many friends same as you here, what you have written is called “jesus delusion”, is it really a delusion? No one can say but try to dismiss it and focus on having right decisions cause even if you are really the savior of humanity it will be through right decisions,

Be here regularly cause it will help,
Welcome again,

Hi @Sardonic Welcome to the forum! It’s good that you’re seeing a pdoc and therapist. :slight_smile:

Since you’re still quite young, it’s important that you get treatment early for the best outcome. I would recommend that you contact an Early Diagnosis & Treatment Center if there’s one near where you live.

Research has confirmed repeatedly that the earlier that people get treatment for the early signs of mental illness (especially schizophrenia and related disorders) the better the long term outcome for the person.

You can read more here:
The Importance of Early Treatment for Schizophrenia and Psychosis

Also, here is list of Early Diagnosis & Treatment Centers. Maybe there is one near where you live.
Worldwide Early Diagnosis & Treatment Centers for Psychosis & Schizophrenia

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Om_Sadasiva: Yeah, I’ve considered this. If God made the beings tell me my mission, then buried the mission in my subconscious mind, then the beings would exist as the personification of my subconscious mind.

ZombiePupper: They hurt my feelings sometimes, and scratch at the inside of my head and heart, but if they figure out how to induce more complex hallucinations… I’m afraid.

@aliali: Hi, thank you. I’m not humanity’s sole savior, I know that; but I do think I have a mission to help save humanity. I’m just not 100% certain about it.

@Moonbeam: Thank you for your welcome. I’m kinda just here because everyone else thinks I’m delusional, and because of that I’m not sure. I figure that, if I were delusional, I wouldn’t have any doubts, but after being basically shunned on the OCD forum and chatroom that I usually go to, save a few friends thatvwant to help but don’t know how, I have nowhere else to turn. People keep telling me I’m delusional or schizophrenic and so I just found a forum that looked nice and joined.

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I’ve been doing some thinking. The beings, I think they should be called watchers because they watch my mind, body, and soul. They watch the world through my eyes. They can put thoughts into my mind. They originated in my subconscious mind, where God put them once my soul formed, then they had to grow strong enough to reach my conscious mind. Once they did, they could tell me about the mission like God told them to, then mess with me as much as they want, but there are limits on what they’re allowed to do. Now they want to be able to induce hallucinations. They’re getting stronger and I can’t stop them. I could kill myself, but then I wouldn’t be able to help save humanity. I think God put them there to make the story more interesting, or to test me, to see if I would choose to end this or save humanity. I don’t know what I want to do.

you 're delusional. get your meds please…

I took them last night like I was supposed to. They don’t do anything. I’m afraid because if it weren’t real then they would do something.

How many antipsychotics did you try?

5mg of Abilify didn’t do anything and 5mg of Zyprexa isn’t doing anything. Doesn’t that mean it’s all real? They should’ve done something, yeah?