I had one Feb of 2016. I was totally psychotic and the ‘mind controllers’ took over and tried to kill me. I cut my wrist and took all my meds. I am extremely lucky to be here. It is fortunate that AP’s and Mood Stabilizers don’t kill you. I wasn’t even sad or anything. I just went crazy and believed that if I died, I would come back as God. One of the main reasons I take meds is to prevent trips like that one. My delusion of being in a brain study has remained steady since day 1 as well as before and after my suicide attempt. If you had a SA, were you psychotic or depressed?
“Have you ever had a suicide attempt?”
i’ve thought of it many times, even wanted to cut my hands off. never acted on the thoughts though
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OMG. thank God you never acted on those thoughts. Glad to hear it.
yes before and after becoming psychotic I had a lot more motivation to go through with it once I became psychotic but I can just never seem to cut deep enough : (
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yeah, a few times, some serious, some not at all.
Depressed? yes.
Psychotic? me, my environment, or both- yes.
@sigarino I am glad you were unsuccessful.
@Csummers Sounds like it has happened to you a few times. I hope it never does again.
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Last December I tried to kill myself. I went off my medication, had a bad episode which ended in a total breakdown where I crashed, thought I had to die to be reborn, and took all my Abilify. It didn’t work obviously, and I am glad I survived. One could say it was a new beginning, getting out of the hospital that is.
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Yes. I was dying of depression and embarrassment. I took a bottle of Sominex, an over-the-counter sleeping medication.
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i tried cut my veins when i was 16 and i failed was a very dark period of my mind.
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I’ve had a couple serious attempts
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only one serious attempt in college, where I tried to hang myself
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The most suicidal day of my life was mothers day of 2013 (which was exactly 4 years ago)…I didn’t want my Mom to remember mothers day as the day her son killed herself so I was gonna wait a couple days…became less suicidal every day since then. Also my belief in heaven/hell at the time saved me. Don’t think about suicide anymore…
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I went to the hospital in 2012 because I confessed to a counselor I had thoughts on killing myself. At this point I just wanted help because depression, hallucinations, panic attacks every night was just getting out of hand. It was all due to severe bullying and probably another factor was my drug use. So I was put in the hospital, waited 8 hours to finally get a room. They had no rooms left in the psych ward cause for some reason only have like 12, so they gave me the option I could go home or they would send me to another unit. I knew I couldn’t go home so I went to another unit. I was put in a room with a guard at my door 24/7 always watching me. The guards never took a break and I wasn’t aloud out. My psychiatrist came to see me she only stayed for 2 minutes. I was petrified of getting an IV or something so I began to eat all the food I got. I quickly learned 2 days in all I’ve been doing was staring at a wall all day everyday and being given numerous pills I didn’t even know of while someone was always watching me like a hawk. My doctor came in once again only saw me for like 2 minutes. I knew I couldn’t stay in there so I “faked” that I was feeling better and in 5 days they released me.
The first night I got home I felt helpless because not even the hospital could help me no matter how bad it was. All they did for the week was drug me and make me stare at a wall with one window that shown nothing outside. So I overdosed on anti psychotics, put a bag over my head, tied it tight and laid down in my bed. All I remember after that was it got blurry as it got harder to breath and got a little darker by the second. I then panicked and ripped it off and I passed out from the terror that just happened. I didn’t talk about it to anyone so I wouldn’t have to go back.
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One time I took 4500 mg of Trazodone. I’d heard that four grams was enough to kill you. Apparently, I am immune to any amount of Trazodone. It had no effect on me.
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I tried twice in 2000, during my second year of college. I confessed about the first time to a friend, and she made me promise her I would seek help, which I did. The Prozac I was put on did nothing, left me hopeless, so I tried again. That time I ended up in an ER, got sent home from school and checked myself into a psych unit. They put me on Wellbutrin, which helped.
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