Hate my country - Lithuania

First of all, until I moved to UK to study it looked like a decent country, but now I back to living here it’s horrible and here’s why:

  1. Gloomy and depressed atmosphere: my country was a battleground of WW1 and WW 2 and is deep into alcoholism. We are Number 2 of alcohol consumption in Europe per person. Because there are so many alcoholics, most of them you meet during the day is either drunk or pissed off because of hangover. There is also a lot of people not holding a high value of home pets, most dogs are chained, not vaccinated and really aggressive (was attacked on the street with my dog couple of times). Also there are block buildings that are not refurbished and look from 1950’s. We are number 1 according to suicide rates in the world.
  2. People lack basic manners: it is rarely that people while squeezing between someone says “excuse me” and you will never almost hear someone at a shop saying “please”. Also as a Barista, a lot of people give me some comments when I miss-pronounce any words or my voice sounds flat because of my negatives.
  3. People get into rumors too deep: As from growing up, I’ve read and was taught not to spread rumors or not to talk negatively about someone for not experiencing myself. My mom is really into rumors and 60% of her talking is basically what other people i don’t know did are are doing. Also from my experience is that dating for me is difficult as there have been some cases when I go on a first date with a girl and she knows more about me than my good friends, for example: that I am schizophrenic and was hospitalized in a mental ward. So it does increase my paranoia, when someone just started talking knows your past.
  4. Stigmatization of mental illness: as mentioned earlier, people tend to gossip a lot and because of that most your neighbors and acquaintances know that you are mentally ill and because of that is much less likely to employ you in your home town. There are plenty of cases of me talking to a girl and when somehow she gets to know that I am ill, she decides that we shouldn’t be together. Hence: I am comparing UK, which mental health is much less stigmatized than in Lithuania
  5. Low living standarts: Minimum wage here is like 4$ an hour before tax. People rarely get any breaks at their jobs, electronics, food costs more than rich first world countries like UK and Germany. Food quality and variety is also worse than many countries. A lot of people are still using “outside toilets” in towns and cities. There have been some reports on the news that someone’s toilet got broken in a flat so started keeping all the manure inside their balcony or just throwing it outside.
  6. Bullying and discrimination: It is really widespread, many overweight, different hair color, different sexuality people get bullied here. As me, partly ginger and being from a countryside was bullied for 10 years until I moved to UK, I was afraid go to canteen, study or just walk around school. I felt self-conscious about my hair color and weight. There are weekly fights in school yard that school administration does nothing about it. Students start smoking when they are 12-13 and school and parents still does nothing. I myself was beaten several times and school and was always followed and felt being persecuted.

Thank you for your time.

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That sounds tough. Are you able to work? Could you move to another country? Or are you basically stuck there? I guess it depends on how well you can handle working full time. I’m sorry you’re going through this. That’s just so much to deal with

I’m working low end job as a fast food crew member at a local barista’s, I’m not earning much, haven’t got a full pay yet. I have to give all my money to my mom because of debt we have. I don’t have enough money to move somewhere like UK again. I need at least 1200£ saved up. I get nasty comments about my hand tremor because of risperidone and I feel I’m doing something really difficult while bringing just a cup of coffee to a table because of my tremor.

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Come to Denmark if you can’t stay in UK due to brexit. It’s harsh and gloomy in some parts of the countryside and intolerant to certain immigrants, mainly muslims, but in copenhagen, aarhus, we are pretty tolerant, but introvert and we have a history with the Baltics and are generally fond of them.

Or you might have a better, more interesting option.

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It’s hard to adapt to a new country. If I’d move I would move to UK again, many countrymen are in Denmark or Norway working, but language barrier is real. I don’t think I could learn Danish as I already struggle with my native language and English

Of course. And it’s hard to find friends in Denmark because people are very closed and keep to themselves, unfortunately, but in Copenhagen i have met several baristas that only speak english.

I’m sorry you can’t move because of debt. Hopefully, one day you’ll be able to save up and go where you’re more comfortable. Do you take medicine for your tremor? I take cogentin and it works for me.

I was supposed to take trihexephenidyl, but all those anti-tremor medication gives me really bad dry mouth and gives my like panic attack confusion. So I can’t use them

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I’m sorry. That sucks.

I mostly moved because of bullying and discrimination. After I returned from UK I started to see many more flaws

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Culture differences.
Hope you at least have some friends.

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