I started getting (or recalling and remembering) my dreams (nightmares) after 2016 at the earliest and more likely 2019 at the latest. I am into conspiracy theories and read about Donald Marshall and then that stuff started happening to me after I followed him or got into his stuff and researching it for whatever reasons. I’m not sure if I was ‘targeted’ or why I was targeted but I get the feelings my dreams are way too real and almost like Satan, aliens, or the Illuminati are doing it and it feels weird and I feel pain in my dreams but in another body, like a clone. It feels like a parallel universe or past life, really.
It doesn’t last long like 1-20 minutes max. It does feel like quantum mechanics of parallel universes, but the internet is the same, deterministic really for each universe or each life. For instance, if I created Bitcoin a trillion past lives ago, then why is it still on the internet? Am I a clone? Is it a delusion? Do I have amnesia because I have no bitcoin or proof? Was it someone else we don’t know? I would say it’s my delusion and it’s impossible for others and myself that I did it in a past life (parallel universe) and that’s why I was given schizophrenia (by God/Illuminati/aliens).
I have the matrix delusion I guess and it has improved over the years quite substantially to the point I doubt it now.
I used to call the matrix people or creators computer simulators or computer programmers like the Anunnaki or something and even thought I was one.
I do really want to know (need to know) if this is a schizophrenic thing or symptom (doctor said it wasn’t) like it’s hynogogic hallucinations, sleep paralysis, or something, but I wonder if it has to do with brain damage or my ‘drinking excessively’. Is it just delusions and hallucinations?
I also feel like I go to parallel universes at night or experience time slips or quantum hopping or quantum immortality even. I tend to go back or they bounce time back when I die. It’s so weird I think it’s aliens doing it.
I also wonder if the Illuminati or aliens are cloning people like the greys or reptilians and using them for control or even Mk ultra now.
It affects my religion to the point I think I’m demon possessed and I feel like I won’t go to Heaven or can’t. It doesn’t happen every night but it happens frequently.
It feels like the “cloning centers” and my REM consciousness (astral body/soul) and stuff like that where I wake up in a lab, hospital, or virtual reality or room and I’m tortured, die, and other things like being brainwashed or having sex sometimes (celebrities). I wonder if it’s a virtual reality thing via a mental implant (chip) and mind uploading via satellites and super computers now. Some of it seems fake or my imagination or fantasies. The people talk in my dreams and I’m not in control and I even feel emotions and stuff and cannot move and I’m usually in a chair or something like ‘West-world’ for lack of a better explanation.
It does feel like the CIA’s MK-Ultra Monarch Program where they clone people, but I don’t know. I had a great life before 2011, where I developed schizophrenia and before that I feel like I experienced reincarnation or butterfly effect and maybe I died and came back alive in the same reality or a closely different, but related reality. I do have the hell-like experience I have past life traumas (memories) and deja vu and I lived and died an infinite amount of times. Now, I cannot remember my life before I got sick (estimating here) because I feel like two different people/split brain. Like two different lives or a broken timeline around 2011.
Are they lucid dreams, are they hallucinations, or is it something else entirely? Before I got schizophrenia, I just had wet dreams or no dreams or basic, boring thoughts, dreams, fantasies, where I planned my day and stuff like that.
I feel like I post too much but therapy is useless for me which is why I 'm on these forums now to relate and talk to others.
The therapists want me to drink water, exercise, and get plans and goals and want to talk about basic things and I’ve done that for so many years now I’m done.
They do not want to entertain, engage, or believe my delusions.
These frequent dreams affect my day, and my abilities and functioning. The dream memories overlay my real memories and I get implanted memories, I guess.
Ya, I even wonder if time travel and teleportation and portal technology was involved, because I had a dream one time with “Emma Roberts” and I never met her. In fact, the room looked different and I never leave the house or go anywhere and I felt skinnier.
Maybe it was an astral entity or something or imagination/hallucination. I do wonder if it’s my subconsciousness too.