Had a total personality change after psychosis

I was diagnosed in 2017. I had a strange form of psychosis. I had mainly delusions and some abnormal thinking. The abnormal thinking did a number on me and I still struggle with some of the residuals even now when I’m well into recovery.

Because of my struggle with intrusive/abnormal thoughts I’ve become a lot more nicer to myself and others that have mental illness.

Before my diagnosis I was a savage, I was strong and resilient and most importantly people liked me.

Now I have no friends, don’t go out, don’t date, and this has all been totally acceptable because of the pandemic but I was like that even before covid tbh. Now I’m trying to start new relationships but I can’t help but wonder if people will like me and want to continue the friendship? My cousin and my best friend said I’m so different than how I used to be.

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The illness has humbled me more than it’s made me grandiose. And grandiosity was one of my main symptoms. I enjoy it though and it’s advantages, the humility.

The illness at first changed me for the much worse it made me psychotic and grandiose but then I find a more balanced approach. It’s hard to balance often. I find myself saying paranoid things to people which doesn’t always come off as balanced. But balanced us my goal. I’m working on it.

People like people who are down to earth. As long as you give credit to people a lot and act interested and be yourself people will tend to like you.

Real friends, people who really wanna be your friends and don’t have superficial reasoning for being friends will eventually emerge you just gotta be yourself the best you can be!!

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How long its been since you lost your friends and at what age? I had to make new friends as my presz friends are all much further in life than me, they finished university, are working with their degree, are married and some have children, etc

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I was diagnosed at 25. I lost all my friends a year later at 26. Yeah I understand that. I feel like mental illness delays plans.

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You can try contacting your presz friends. I know its harder to make new friends with sz. My presz friends all left me, more like I was the cause too as I wrote crazy scary stuff on fb and many unfriended me. Others I insulted bcz they told me to get back on my meds. I told them they’re the crazy ones, not me, so they left me. Others I unfriended on fb while psychotic as I was paranoid.

Others I contacted and they said they’re busy working and busy with their families etc What helped me is that my parents have friends who have sons my age. I asked their parents for their phone number and we became friends. Then I also became friend with their friends. Now I have one best friend who calls me everyday and 2 others that talk to me every week.

You can also make friends at school, church/other religious places, work, mental health club or even online on https://www.meetup.com/ and other websites.

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Thank you! I relate to a lot of what you said. I’ll try that.

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Isolation occurs and is quite common.

Before your diagnosis, if you were a different person, that would make sense.
The diagnosis changes you, changes your perception.

It may take some time to adjust to the changes, before you can make new friends, or you can keep the ones you have.

Good luck!

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