im not liking hearing guy voice, he says things that are traumatizing, he says to me he will put me in physcosis, then i feel happy cuz i have meds to counter act it, but still he has aggrssive abuse tactic im so scareds inside, i use dope to cover what i truly feel inside, this guy hates me and everything i do
and when i do something he likes im stuck with i always have to prove, to him if i dont do dope
i dont know my confidence for my future sober life i believe i will not be able to cope,
every day sucks, i want my kids back im to trauma tized , and even though i realize ,
still to my well being my partners and my kids i choose to comprimise
im scared of the consiquences, but fear the worst maybe i will not be able to feel and identify, and another fear, if i just let him talk to me the way he does, what then i just have to put up with this guy, i get so angry
sometimes i just wanna die, but im to busy getting high, and my kids go with out me, he attempts to give me an understanding to my questions when i silently express my desire why, and who are you, what are you, only later to find out his answer was a lie, he wants me to suffer, it keeps me sick, im wanting help,
its really a feeling of yup extremely desperate.
soon as im good, do all the right things, it was all for nothing he just forgets,
guess karma has it out for me, now a days its very hard to stay happy,
what next ,??? wait i forgot my illness in this day n age cure is far fetched, the mind is to complex
■■■■ sakes, i just we all can get better, im grateful sometimes im not dead yet.
on the other hand anyone use the theraputic stradigy of caring for a pet?