My bdays coming up.
I got blanked at by a family member for wanting something for my birthday.
She says that a bday present is chosen by the one giving the gift and the person recieving the gift shouldn’t ask for something, it’s up to the person buying the gift.
Im as poor as a dog and i got blanked at for wanting a bday present.
I live in the bizarro world and energy where everything is backwards, where a gift given, an important gift i might add, has no concern with what the person getting the gift needs or wants but is more about what the person wants to buy them.
It wouldn’t matter really but i am as poor as a dog and can’t work and i got “blanked” at for wanting a bday present.
If one is upside down he can see what is right side up in this world, the entire world was upside down and backwards.
@pansdisease I’m sorry that happened. But happy almost birthday. I think what your family member might be saying is that part of the fun of giving a gift to someone is picking it out for them.
However I understand how you feel since money is tight and you want a specific gift. There is nothing wrong with feeling that way. My mom and I have a deal that a month before my birthday she has to tell me if she is picking out my gift. If not I get a certain amount of money I can spend on Amazon.
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It’s selfish as f#$%.
I thought when you buy a gift you try and buy what the person wants and needs? Wtf?
Is that not what people do? Or do they buy others gifts for themselves?
I always buy people gifts that I think they will enjoy that are interesting and something I personally find neat. I never buy simply functional gifts that won’t give any enjoyment, like a blender or toaster. I work hard at finding something cool.
Many people I’ve bought gifts for in the past were very practical people who wouldn’t buy things for themselves or, if they did, bought things they needed instead of things they’d enjoy.
And yes, I agree, it’s the person buying the gift who should decide what the gift will be. People can suggest ideas but I make the final decision.
If i could give gifts id try and figure out what they needed and/or wanted.
I would just make it about them and not about myself.
The ones im with never do this, they buy gifts for themselves and not for the person they buy it for and in doing this they make it not a gift. It’s like a person screeching at you “you’ll take what i want you to have!” When it should sound something more like “what do you want?”
Thats not even what giving means, that isn’t giving or a gift.
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I disagree. Giving comes from the heart. There’s a difference between putting thought and a part of yourself into something you give instead of just being a gift registry. If I knew someone really wanted something in particular then it would influence what I get them but I always try to add my own ideas to any gift.
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And then they call me selfish.
But that isn’t what selfishness means, you are buying things for someone for yourself and not for them, you are being selfish not me.
Music is a good one, a funny one, people sometimes try and “give” others what they themselves want and like without trying to get the person what they want, that isn’t giving, thats taking.
It’s just extra bad because i’ve gone without almost every principle thing one needs and wants this entire time and they don’t give a ■■■■ at all, they just want to give me what they want and care not what i need and want.
I’ve been writing about general terms, not your case in particular. I’d be disappointed if I wanted something and didn’t get it too.
But that isn’t giving.
You give someone what they want and need, nothing of what we want and like should be a part of it. It is all about the person getting the gift, what they want and need.
Otherwise it isn’t giving at all.
It’s not even things that i want, it is things that i really need.
Im doing without a lot of things one needs and they don’t care at all. They just want to give something to themselves that would be fun for themselves.
It’s truly maddening and kind of makes me want to end it to be honest. I’ve got so many knives in my back and this is just one more, it’s mounting, again and again and again.
Sorry man. When is your birthday anyway?
When is your Birthday?
When you are talking about someones birthday, usually the person is asked what they want-and if the giver can afford it and can get it-then yes. Every family does it differently I suppose. If its just a special gift on any day, then that would just be something from the heart.
I am sorry Pan, but maybe it will be a surprise anyway!
You can always hand over a list and hope they get the hint
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