Getting high... insight desired

so, as you may know, I have an addiction to mary jane. she’s such a temptress, the laughing, the tears. the crazies, the quiet. 20mgs of Olanzapeanut and 250g of depacoyote. leading to being in a haze, not getting much done… can you understand the allure?

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You should seek some help getting rid of this addiction

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what do you recommend?

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NA or similar idk i’m not from US, and i never tried drugs because i know they are bad

just how you chose not to be sz, i didn’t choose this addiction. It has cost me so much: my mental state, maybe a career, peace of mind, friends. Drugs are bad, but drugs are used for good, too.

Ok, it’s your choice man

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addiction is an illness, sometimes it goes beyond choice. I’m utterly powerless over it. but my life hasn’t become unmanageable. yet.

It’s hard to ask for help. I know I’m sick and getting worse every time I indulge in it. Please pray for me.

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Prayers sent :pray:

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It is a lifestyle choosing mj. Everything about it is intoxicating and alluring. The roll, the smell, the feelings, and for me awhile back the growing. It is a whole way of life. The plant can rule your life. You can spend every waking minute seeking the stuff and then not care anything for the world or your life. It can make everything tolerable, but with the mj you are not really living.

You are not present and it seems that every aspect of life can be improved by the mj. A slave to the drug. It has been 17 years since I smoked and i was a true pothead. I still miss it everyday. NAC has lessened the cravings somewhat though and along with meditation I still get high, just without the mj.

For life to really begin, the addict part of self must die. That is the whole life built around mj needs to stop. A whole new life has to created and other things in life celebrated. Getting things done, experiencing the moment in full and getiing new hobbies Everything mj stood for has to be left deceased as part of another life.

Of course, it is difficut to do. You need to identify what you want to do and then head towards it, but it is possible. It just takes time to realise it.

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Thank you for the insightful message. Congrats on 17 years sober from MJ. In my 20 years with co-occurring illnesses, one year was my greatest sobriety time. I never thought, after being a scholar-athlete, I’d be a person with a marijuana addiction. and sza.

I think there is a lack in my life. I’m using pot to fill this void. Figure out what the void is, fill the lack. the void is that I’m bored. The lack is the number of hobbies and friends. Increase the hobbies, make some new friends. Hobbies I can do. Friends will be difficult.

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What is NAC? I too am trying to find a way to live without it

Hi you little devil, I’m Gene.

Motivational interviewing is what finally helped me quit a couple of years ago.

NAC is a suppement that has proven to help lessen craving.

http://cdn.intechopen.com/pdfs/40326/InTech-N_acetylcysteine_as_a_treatment_for_addiction.pdf

It is also used to help sz symptoms so it is a win win.

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for once, i’m hesitating to click.

It is safe, so don’t worry.

I see. Please tell me more.

Why not try attending narcotics anonymous?

Scared. Don’t know how dualies (dual dz) are received. never knew at a ma meeting. i need to make a meeting any meeting.