From @X_Y_Z :
I wanna start from, my first memories, as far I can.
Lesson 1: Infancy
My Mom was carrying me and sending off my brother to school.
Then I remember cutting my first B’day cake for which I was crying a lot, as I was scared, as knife is held by bad people, that perception was negative oriented, may be I was inclined to such incidents from birth, who knows?
Meanwhile, I used to see things which were not real, as per my parents, used to see worms on my bed and cockroch’s in the entire room filled. My parents say I was given extra cough syrup due to which caused the above.
After that I remember scoring well in my studies like at the age of 3 to 7, also was good in painting or drawing, had drawn Taj Mahal for which I was awarded first price in the school competition.
Later on I was a victim of isolation for 3 years from 7 to 10 years, I did something I never knew its bad, had a friend and I misbehaved with her, IMO , later it became a complaint, and I was made to sit on floor. Not like others in my class.
All looked down on me, in such times, one of my friend stuck chewing gum on the teachers bench, and the teacher called out 7 guys, and asked who did it or all will be punished, then I took the blame, as I thought the punishment would be less, but I had to stand outside the pass way holding a boarding saying I did it and won’t repeat it, after that had to call my parents, to whom I said the truth, its not me its the other guy.
Due to which I started to lend hear to what others spoke, as I was alone in the floor, I was over hearing what teacher was discussing with another school member, she caught me listening and beat me up black and blue, after half an hour she realized her mistake and informed me not to let my parents know, which I did not inform.
Later in the same year was beaten up multiple times, once it was evident my back side of my hand was swollen, and was taken to hospital and the doc said to inform to the cops, which did not happen, but only ended as an escalation with the principal.
Lesson 2: Childhood
I had changed my school to one of the best institutions in my city.
It was hard but made lots of friends and those where all not so good influence, I used to make friends after a good fight.
I still remember getting beaten up under the desk and kicked.
Later we where best gang in school. Unfortunately, all my circle of friends dropped out of school, then I started to participate in sports, like swimming, hockey, cricket, table tennis, football in which I clicked. Played for my city too, under 16.
I had to choose sports or studies, so my parents said studies is better, went along listening to them.
But the time leaving the school, my friends circle grew, and had a school trip, with booze. I was the person incharge.
Lesson 3: Teenager
I started to smoke and drink occasionally, and started to perform low in studies. First voices through music, felt like they where talking to me, started to stop choosing friends, and let people choose, for me. Isolation starts. Studies decline in rapid phase.
Choosing bachelor’s in computer science, as per my parents suggestion, still ended up having subjects carried to next semesters, performed really bad.
Drank every week end and smoked, lost hope in studies and got worried about my future, then there was campus placements in which I was placed in a company.
My parents supported me when I showed interest at last in studies, I believed in second chance. Progressed to Mater’s in computer science, where I performed well in 3 semesters, and stopped drinking and smoking, but the voices and suspicious and isolation increased, dropped out off college and was diagnosed as SZ.
Lesson 4 : Youth.
Spent 3 years at home bound, taking treatment. Then my cousin showed up as I tried around 45 to 50 interviews and lost hope, I accompanied him and I got the job, from that company to another, finally stable at a job for 3.6 years, after which these thoughts of my master discontinued thoughts popped it and request parents to study further, they denied, and I started to smoke for a silly reason.
Which lead to a sharp decline again, lost the career path, to joblessness.
After years of realization, approx 12 years dx’d, this is my story till present.
The lessons does not end here, it’s just an introduction still long way to go.
Currently on aripiprazole 20 MG, and improving.
I dont know if its a success, just me at present.