I’ve been feeling really suicidal lately. I’ve just been hating life and getting in a lot of arguments with my roommate. The annoying this is that when I’m frustrated and want to leave I have no where to go. I have no friends or family to go see. I’m too poor to afford a gym pass even though I wish I had one. And I have no money to sit in a bar or get a bottle of wine and sit in my apartments parking lot drinking. Hate everything and seeing and hearing things a lot tonight.
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Wow. that frustration is so familiar to me. Life can be such a ball of crap.
Topping on the cake is not having an outlet to vent outside and away from others. Mine feels like a double blade sword, arguments at home, nowhere to get away feom it all.
Makes wanting to leave this life so much more inticing.
I sure want a ticket out of here.
Wonder if things get better somewhere else.
One can only hope so.
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Yeah also feeling frustrated. Your not alone. Only youtube to keep me company. I really hate everyone anyways. Now it’s not because I’m psychotic but for the same reasons I always did. Duck it.
I know how you feel. Sometimes when I fight with my husband I feel the same way! Hope things turn around for the better for you! I would suggest go for a walk to the nearest park or downtown or whatever your neighbourhood has to offer. I’m very fortunate I live by the beach so when I need time out I go walk on the beach.
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I’m being gangstalked and head hunted. Sometimes I don’t see the use but my gf and family help.
I should probably get ahold of my mom sometime soon.
I’m frustrated because of a lot of things going on at the VA
If you have no where to go and no gym pass. What about a walk around the block or a jog? Those are free activities, they’ll let out some energy/emotion.
I am so sorry you feel so down @Nzbitnoff please post as much as possible for support while you are feeling this way? I know what you mean by being poor.
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I think you look attractive. You should get a boyfriend and move in with him. I think you should get working if you can handle a job. That’s what I would do.
I had my life handed to me, a full scholarship and an honors psychology program just there for free. My parents support me financially, I dont have to work my way through school. I have a bright mind, that much is obvious with my success in college. Life is challenging for me in a different way- I am expected to do great things, yet I am supported and handed the opportunities.
Making your way when you aren’t raised to become a doctor or lawyer is something I do not have experience with. My parents expected me to be some sort of professional when I was born, in fact they demanded higher education and success as a student. It has become my own ambition after my diagnosis- they told me that I didnt have to do school, that I was disabled. If I were you, I would work and date guys. Some guy will like you for who you are, being an attractive woman is much much easier than being an attractive man, disability or no disability.
and of course, medication and therapy, professional help. I gotta include that.
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Are you in therapy? Maybe you could look for community resources to help you. In bigger cities they have “emotions anonymous” groups. I know about the solitary drinking. I do that myself.
if you are feeling bad please talk to your therapist about it…things do get better.
a bunny hug 
for you.
take care 
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Wow thank you all for the support. it’s nice to feel like I’m not the only one in the world with these feelings
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Wow, this time of the year - the Holiday Season makes many people on edge.
I had an argument with my father this evening, because he is in an argumentative type mood and decided to lash out and take his frustrations on the mentally ill person as usual - that would be me
He really pissed me off and I kind of lost it with my emotions - but I do not like bullying type behavior in adults.
Both my brother and father have this habit to take out on me when they are having bad days and this is totally unacceptable