Man, why’d you d-bags have to follow me here. Everything was fine until you showed up. Now my brain’s bleeding and ■■■■. Stop ruining my life.

You know I had real friends before, you know the kind that didn’t just treat you like a science experiment, actually called you to hang out and genuinely respected you as a person. Furthermore, the only reason that I don’t right now at this moment in time is because my brain is currently bleeding.

The greatest move I ever made in life was ditching you.

Time: 1:45

Dude you’re Jewish man, just go to synagogue and leave me out of your bizarre philosophies.