Finally showered and had to get out

Its been a week and i finally showered
i had to get out in a short time cause the water turned to blood
this happens alot makes me want to cut to see real blood
it was so intense this time i tried to talk to my mom about it
she got aggravated cause she doesn’t understand why it happens
she even told me not to talk to my treatment team about it cause she says they will throw me in the hospital
im sorry if im triggering anyone i just need to get this off my chest

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Sounds unpleasant do you get that often

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Don’t listen to your mother. Be honest with your team. It’s important for your mental health.

She doesn’t have to live with the symptoms. You do.

And they don’t always rush to send you to the hospital over a hallucination.

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@shellys12 yes most showers yes thats why i dont shower as often as i should

thank you @ZombieMombie you are right i have a meeting with my team tomorrow i will talk to them with possible tools to deal with it as summer is coming and i will need to take more showers cause of sweat

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Sorry that’s happening to you, that must be awful, I feel for you. Good that you will talk with your team, maybe they can help. Practically: my greatgrandma didn’t have a shower or bath in her home or even hot water, I still remember her living without. She washed herself with boiled water in a tub. It’s a bit different than we are used to in the West and a bit oldfashioned, and maybe you already wash up like that, but you might just want to wash yourself well with hot water in a tub?? Or would it change into blood too? It’s inconvenient, but showers aren’t the only way to clean yourself, I guess.

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ty @anon4136120 i have trouble with water in general but its a good idea to try

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Hm. That’s unfortunate. Okay, the most random and weirdest idea just came up. There are tablets and lights to change the colour of your bath or shower to for example bright green. Maybe your brain would be so shocked by that, that it wouldn’t change it to red. It’s probably a useless idea, and maybe it would only creep you out more, but it just popped into my mind, sorry. :blush:

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Sorry you’re having a tough time. I second being honest psych team. They may be able to help with a change in meds or otherwise. I think maybe mom is the one you shouldn’t talk to about these things if that’s the kind of advice she offers. Omitting info from your psych team can be counterproductive. Good on you for deciding to go through with telling them.

Also I want to take a moment to specifically congratulate you on doing the hard thing! I can imagine how hard it must be to shower when that happens. You did something positive today. That’s awesome.

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ty @bittercat

that means alot

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You’re so welcome. It’s a victory worth celebrating:)

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