I work in an army reserve office building. I’m a janitor. Best job I’ve ever had. It’s only ten minutes from my house, it’s not too hard physically, we get long breaks, their are several coke machines in the building and I can stop and drink a diet soda during the day and my boss looks the other way. I know what I am going to do every day. I know what I’m doing and I get to work alone and my boss trusts me. And it pays good. BUT… on the negative side…Everyone there is a control freak.Yes, I know the story. Soldiers are a different breed, yadda, yadda, yadda. And yes, a few of them risk their lives. And that’s honorable and respectable and brave. So I give them that. But I have to rant here. But in reality, if I give them an inch, they will take a mile. Not only do they have to have control, but it means they think they have to win at all costs and they act like it is their duty to destroy me.Both men and women. They act like they HAVE to. The women show no respect. They act like I’m invisible.Forget about them treating me a a man, they don’t even treat me with an ounce of respect or like I deserve as much as anybody.And they think it’s funny. They may be noble, but they are people. Who aren’t perfect and are perfectly happy with treating me like I don’t have 53 years on this planet.It’s not even really an age thing to me. It’s more like, what the hell is so special about them that they can treat me any way they like? And the games and head trips. I lose every confrontation.Badly. But lately I’ve been getting mad. At them and my co-workers.Where does it say that I am not supposed to fight back? And I had pretty much been feeling lately like giving up and not even trying to stick up for myself. But like I said I realized today that they want to, strut around and they don’t want me to fight back.And when that hit me, a little ounce of self-respect ignited in me. It stuck in my craw that they are winning without firing a shot. So I started strutting around and trying to intimidate them back. Why not? And you know what? IT FELT GOOD… REALLY GOOD. And people started backing down.AND IT FELT GOOD. Yes, they are there to do a job. But where does it say that every one of them is free to bulldoze over me? And win by trickery. Today I leveled the playing field. I’m sick of confident people. I’m sick of people with low-self esteem using ME to get confidence. I’m sick of being on the receiving end of those self-satisfying smirks they get because I LET THEM.
Nick I really do understand, and know what you mean. I have taken my brother’s crap for years - decades now.
He enjoys bullying me around - him and his wife are 2 bullies, snobs who take pleasure in putting me down in their own way. They lack morals and confidence, they seem to me to be a couple of sociopaths. My brother holds on to a lot of hate and resentment against me - he never forgave me, I was not well and it was never intentional on my part, he never let go - always carrying hate in his heart for me and our father, who he blames as well.
Recently I decided not to take his crap any longer, I decided to fight back, and from now on I will not be his or his wifes punching bag. I really do not care any longer, I do not see him in my future anyways - he is a selfish, greedy, materialistic person with no conscience - not a care for others, just him and his wife. I fought back telling him off and letting him know things will be different from now on - I hurt his ego, his pride - and I was glad. It does feel good to fight back
As long as it doesn’t endanger your job in some way…
Yeah, it’s a fine line.
Soldiers have a strong sense of social hierarchy because their military training focuses on these things to make the soldiers obedient. As a group of oppressed creatures they come out to seek someone that is obedient to them. So treating these soldier with equality is better than treating them with respect and admiration.
Wise words to live by, green.
“Don’t let a few bad apples spoil the bunch.” I went out with my wife, and 2 mutual friends tonight, one of which is a mid-20s female 1st Lieutenant in the Army Reserves. She just got back from Afghanistan. Cool as can be. Easy to talk to, laughs a lot, sings karaoke (fun, positive songs), and is well-educated (duh, she’s an officer). Maybe this is the problem you’re encountering. You’re probably stuck with knuckle-dragging regular enlisted people who can’t land a job in the real world, so they do the Army full-time (I have some knowledge of how this system works). My advice: don’t let ignorant people get under your skin. They also, on the other hand, may have experienced trauma overseas and are just a little “off.” Don’t stoop to their level, you’re better than that.
I’m glad you’re fighting back. It seems to be the way of the world that people will walk all over you if you let them. It could be that the military discipline they’re under makes them want to impose that on someone else. Let them know you are not in the army, you are not part of their chain of command, and that they have to treat you like a respectable human being.
Good for you for standing up and not letting yourself be bulldozed over. I’m learning how to do that. I know I’m a push over with some things.
I’m glad you were able to push back merely by standing your ground.
Keep walking tall.
The only military personnel I’ve had to deal with were drunken submariners. These were little more than kids just out of high school though.