Fear of success

I have come to the conclusion that I am afraid of being successful. I actually think it drives my psychosis part of the time. I have been in several positions that allowed me to be very successful. However it seems that I self destruct every time and psychosis always knocks at the door.
So frustrating.

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This thread hits home, I know how you feel. I have the fear that as soon as I become successful at something my psychosis will flare up. Oddjob said I have the impostor syndrom too! Maybe it’s a bit of that… :pensive:

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My fear of success stems from this: if I was successful, people would ask me about my past. And that’s a red light.

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Yeah, it’s a self full-fulling prophecy. I kind of feel I don’t deserve it but those thoughts are starting to fade. Bout time.

I feel ya.

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And it’s not only with jobs. It’s every damn thing. Relationships, goals, etc…

Same here… Don’t you think it has a bit to do with the toll this illness takes on the self esteem? Fear of psychosis actually makes my symptoms worse. I don’t think I deserve good things, etc.

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From a quick Amazon search… it has five stars so maybe it’s worth reading.

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psychosis guilt is huge for me. If ya know what I mean.

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i am right there with you. i should be a homeowner right now but i screwed up really bad and now i make a little over minimum wage and live with my grandmother. time to start over

Thanks @Bluey! :smiley:

We are great punters aren’t we?

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I have a fear of being successful because i fear everyone will try to take me down. But u just gotta put in the work anyway

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I do know. I struggle with it everyday.

my old therapist used to try to teach me that i was self sabotaging. i had a very hard time wrapping my head around it. I drank and drugged to numb my pain but it only made me worse. then bam the psychosis hit hard and i have been in limbo for 4 years. i focused on what i didnt have and all the negative things in the world. We all deserve to be successful and healthy. let’s figure it out

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Oh! You are doing something great huh? Gotta fix that! Let’s do something twice as bad or counter productive!!! Ugh!

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I agree 100%. I refuse to let this control me anymore.

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I’m just going to tell you something someone pretty smart said to me:

I know. Just don’t lay down.

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i have actually felt guilty about becoming successful. my brain is so strange

Yep! I know the feeling. The brain is a strange piece of equipment.

“The brain… the ■■■■■■■ brain”

-Albert Einstein

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