Fear of becoming crazy

Most of the time I’m sceptical regarding my diagnosis (not enough positive symptoms) but the doctors seem convinced and I do have negative and cognitive-like symptoms. I’m currently tapering off my APs under medical supervision. I fear madness, but I need to know how deep the rabbit-hole goes. Sounds familiar?

How did your illness start?

The rabbit hole isn’t super deep. Gets formulaic after a while.

Just rehashing stuff from your subconscience. You don’t get new info.

Sounds like a contradiction.

You’ll probably go mad and then need a higher dose of meds to keep you sane 2nd time round.

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With schizotypal disorder going back a few decades. But the big crisis leading to hospitalisation and the diagnosis came 2 years ago in the form of a depression with psychotic features.

it can get incredibly bad.
but by being alert to earliest warning signs, you could maybe prevent that by immediately going back on meds and watching stress levels

Thanks for the tip.

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Do you get treated for depression?

If your psychosis wasn’t caused by drugs, its genetic and you will likely get madness again without meds.

That’s my fear as well, but I need to know if I can live without APs.

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I take sertraline, but I’m not technically depressed.

No drugs involved.

Its up to you, I quit meds 3 times and all ended up in mental hospital brought by the police. Once I was close to kill myself from Tylenol intoxication and overdose. Drs said I would be dead from liver failure if my parents brought me late to emergency.

I never took drugs so my psychosis is genetic and permanent. I get issues with the police when unmedicated. I threatened ppl.

I smoked weed I think that’s were it stems I feel like iam on a bad high all the time now

I think my psychosis stemmed from weed and also genetics. I’m currently debating with myself if I want to try and lower my medication or even switch medications due to EPS. Everytime I’ve tried lowering my medication, I get violent and suspicious.
My parents have been encouraging and are willing to try and support me if I decide to lower my medication or switch.

As far as I know I don’t have any positive symptoms. I do have negatives that I believe were caused by my AP.

My rabbit hole is very deep - I’ve been medicated with sooooooo much dope and it hardly makes a difference and I’m sure I’ve lost a hefty portion of my mind by now — I used to be extremely intelligent with friends and a great job now I deal with voices constantly - my best advice is take the meds now to avoid the craziness later …

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Becoming? I thought the whole deal was 40 years ago til now.

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