Falling in and out of delusional thinking

Ok so sometimes i get weird thoughts and i accelt them as i get them as actual perceptions. And i will react really badly, i may freak out and yell or be mean or even self harm. Sometimes not that bad, sometimes just be super observant looking for anything to backup my belief. Then awhike later i might just snao out of it a bit and go wait. Is this really happening… or am i being irrational again. I sit there and have a tiny debate with myself then think maybe just irrational. So i wilk try to put it aside and sometimes that is it. Its gone but other times the thinking mught change slightly or just come back altogether and im thinking those things again and reacting the same as before. Then im constantky getting in trouble for reacting badly but to me its an appropriate reaction to what i think is going on. The time alwats changes too sometimes i realize im irrational right away and sometimes it could take awhile. Then when i snao out i usually also get really upset and or depressed with myself for letting it happen once again…