Everyone struggles

Even normies. My roommate says his mom was a stripper and he did a lot of self harming, similar to the way I used to self harm. He’s a total normie. I THINK I’ve had tougher life than him but who really knows/can measure. I have a pretty high threshold for pain. And I remember there was the “anger” period of my life when I felt bad for myself a lot. I always thought my life was easy when I was psychotic, then ■■■■ started getting clear and I realized I had it pretty difficult. But then like 3-4 hospitalizations later I was like “this doesn’t make my life any more difficult, I’ve been here, I just want to get out of this!” I was no longer trying to make having a hard life a competition. Although I’m still guilty of this sometimes. And between those two times I did a lot of self harming. Self harming is something I used to think was my fault but now I aknowledge it as a disease like anything else that’s not your fault. Now my life is pretty good, possibly because I’ve decreased my ego, AND built up a pain tolerance. But still I make songs about struggling. Like this one

https://soundcloud.com/jonjames1/a-little-bit-dark-2

I no longer think my struggling is unprecedented in the history of mankind, but more so, if people can relate to my struggle somewhat it can trigger memories of happiness by attacking the sensitive part of the brain that’s responsible for emotions. I don’t want to say “I’ve had it harder than you” but rather, hope people can relate to what I’m saying since everyone struggles

The end

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